A Nightmare Came To The Place I Escaped - Chapter 30

Chapter 30

 

 

* A thank you to Mar for the Kofis [1 of 3] ヽ(*・ω・)ﾉ *

 

Actually, if he found Rachel.

 

As long as he found her again this time, as he had before, even after she made him suffer so much. All because she didn’t listen to him. 

 

He’d forgive her for all of it.

 

He would have no choice, but to do so.

 

Thud!

 

At that moment, something small ran into him on the bridge.

 

“Hey! I told you to be careful.”

 

The girl who bumped into Ian was crying, as if she was scared of him, as she looked up at him. Behind her, a boy ran up and criticized the child.

 

“Mister, I’m sorry.”

 

The child who ran up quickly apologized for the girl. Ian nodded his head slightly. 

 

The boy bowed his head and apologized again, then he took the girl’s hand and walked away.

 

Brown hair.

 

The child’s hair fluttered in the wind. Her sunny hair shone brilliantly with various colors.

 

“….!”

 

Flustered, Ian rubbed his hand down his face.

 

He hurried his steps as if he was embarrassed.

 

Foolish man.

 

Ian, who was swearing at himself, hurried towards the Imperial palace.

 

Was he completely crazy now?

 

However, no matter how hard he tried to pull himself together, tears flowed down again.

 

She was definitely a quiet girl. She could have followed the boy around all day, and she wouldn’t have said a word. For some reason, it was too vexing to think that one of those women was gone.

 

It was no different from any other day, but the vacancy was noticeable today.

 

Love.

 

Didn’t they say it was a feeling that would disappear soon? But as time went by, he missed her more and more. He was very sad that they couldn’t meet anymore. 

 

A cheeky girl.

 

If she was going to disappear, how could she disappear like that?

 

Ian stopped on his way to the Imperial palace, and changed his path.

 

This was also the road he walked with Rachel. He hurried to the place where there was no memory of her. Then he wondered if he could forget it a little bit. 

 

He wondered if it would be a little less painful. He turned down the road to see if he could breathe.

 

Since when did that girl become everything to him?

 

He thought it would be okay because she had no presence. He thought it wouldn’t matter. 

 

Ian thought he’d be able to hold on. 

 

It was too much, so he wanted to quit now. 

 

Emotions that he’d endured for five years. The feelings ignored him, as if it didn’t know.

 

The emotions that had been suppressed flowed out like a burst dam, with no time to block it or stop it.

 

He couldn’t pretend he didn’t know, or endure it anymore. Ian had no choice, but to accept that he was destined to flounder in this longing and suffering for the rest of his life. 

 

Rachel, who couldn’t be erased.

 

He wanted to be free of this pain and forget Rachel forever, but he didn’t want to forget any of the small things about her. 

 

She liked sweet things, and hated unfamiliar places. 

 

When she laughed, her cheeks would slightly dimple under her eyes.

 

She burned food often as if she had no talent for cooking, but she was smart and a quick learner. Even so, she hated studying and liked to scribble.

 

She always smelled good too.

 

He missed that.

 

The more he thought of Rachel, the harder it was to breathe.

 

Ian’s breathing was gradually getting more ragged. Eventually, he burst into tears like a child. 

 

He didn’t even remember when he last cried.

 

He was crying because he felt hopeless and suffocated, like a child who’d lost their parents.

 

***

 

“Your Majesty?”

 

The head of the knights ran out to receive him, as if he was worried about Ian, who’d returned later than scheduled. 

 

Ian lowered his head as soon as he was found, as if he didn’t want to show his face. 

 

“Are you okay?”

 

Ian pulled his robe even farther over his head, and gave a small nod.

 

“You were late, I was worried.”

“Nothing happened.”

Ian passed by him, only giving a short answer. The head knight hurried to follow him.

 

“Do you have something to say?”

“No, I don’t.”

“I want to be alone, so don’t follow me.”

He wanted to be alone. At Ian’s command, the commander of the knights nodded slightly, and no longer followed him.

 

“Haaa.”

 

He’d returned to the Imperial palace to avoid Rachel’s residual presence. In the end, she manifested herself everywhere.

 

If he stood in front of the window, Rachel was walking in the hallway.

 

Ian hurried to hide in his office. He wanted to confess to someone that he missed Rachel so much that it was almost too much to bear, but Ian couldn’t. 

 

Ian walked around his office in a daze. 

 

Everything went as he wished when he was young. 

 

He eventually became the Emperor, and the Empire grew strong. 

 

No one ignored him for being vulgar anymore. He got everything he wanted. 

 

But in the end, Ian wasn’t happy at all.

 

“Ha….”

 

Ian sighed heavily again.

 

Where did he start getting it wrong?

 

Then what did he have to do?

 

Would he have been happy if he caught her? Would Rachel have returned to him safely if he’d called in the knights sooner to search for her?

 

Ian stopped walking, and buried himself deeply into the sofa.

 

He regretted everything to the fullest.

 

From time to time, Rachel would visit Ian in his dreams and smile at him, seemingly unconcerned, but the more she did so, the more he thought of the last time he saw her face, which was scared and tearful.

 

If he’d been a little more affectionate with her.

 

If she’d been a noble woman. If he hadn’t been so greedy for power. If he didn’t have such low blood. 

 

Would things have been better now if he hadn’t been born into the royal family? Even though he knew it was useless, he kept making meaningless assumptions.

 

If he’d realized that she wouldn’t wait for him for the rest of her life. 

 

“….”

 

He knew that she liked him. She smiled brightly only at him, so he couldn’t help but know.

 

Rachel, who always welcomed him with a bright smile. He always knew it would be like that. 

 

Was it because I thought she was already his?

 

He never felt impatient. He was always given the option of a relationship, so he thought he could have it whenever he wanted it. 

 

“Crazy guy.”

 

He was the most selfish person he knew.

 

Was that why he was being punished?

 

Then why didn’t he just suffer alone?

 

Why Rachel?

 

Ian closed his eyes as if he was in pain, and buried himself deeper into the sofa.

 

***

 

In his dream, he had Rachel in his line of sight.

 

Ian tilted his head, and frowned when his eyes spotted Rachel.

 

What was she doing there?

 

Rachel was leaning against the window frame, and looking up at the stars. He couldn’t see her that well, but something small was shining in her hand.

 

Necklace.

 

Yeah, it looked like a necklace.

 

He approached Rachel with small steps. He stopped suddenly. For some reason, she didn’t seem to be in a very good mood. 

 

“What are you doing?”

“…Ah!”

 

Rachel screamed with her shoulder crouched as if surprised by his sudden appearance. But she quickly recognized him, and bowed her head in a hurry.

 

Rachel held the object in her hand without hiding it. 

 

“What’s that?”

 

Ian glanced at her hand, and inquired. Rachel blinked as if she hadn’t expected him to ask.

“….”

 

The sudden attention seemed to embarrass her. 

 

She reluctantly stretched out her hand and showed him. However, Ian just waited silently as if he wasn’t going to leave until Rachel answered him. 

 

“What, where did you get that?”
“…Someone gave it to me.”

 

Rachel turned away without looking at his face, as if this time she felt uncomfortable.

 

In the palm of Rachel’s hand, he saw a small bottle on the end of a thin necklace. It was filled with a golden liquid. 

 

The moment Ian shook his head as if he couldn’t understand Rachel, she immediately squeezed her hand shut and blocked his view.

 

“Who?”

“I don’t know his name.”
“What?”

“It was the first time we’d met.”

 

Ian raised an eyebrow.

 

Why would she accept something from someone she didn’t even know? In addition, he couldn’t understand what she liked about it so much. 

 

“Where did you meet him?”

“We met at the western palace.”

“What does he look like?”

As he asked her questions, Rachel glanced at him. Like she didn’t want to talk much. 

 

Ian’s brows furrowed, which prompted a response.

 

“He was tall and handsome…”

 

His lips slanted slightly at Rachel’s answer, as he resisted the urge to laugh in vain.

 

Handsome?

 

“What color was his eyes or hair?”

“…Why are you asking that?”

 

Rachel showed a little bit of rebellion at that moment. What does he have to do with who and what she received? What if he found out who gave it to her? Such questions were being revealed on her face. 

 

But when he urged her again, she opened her mouth.

 

“Oh, it was someone with red eyes.”

“Red eyes?”

 

Ian frowned.

 

Harmond Bourke.

 

 It was clear.

 

Not exactly red eyes, but often people mistook his eyes for red. In addition, he’d never heard of anyone else in the Empire with red eyes.

 

Red eyes weren’t human.

 

“Ha?”

 

Handsome… Was Rachel’s taste like that?

 

Harmond Bourke. He was a neat-looking man.

 

“Why did he give you this?”

“I helped him with something, and he gave it to me as a thank you.”

 

His lips came up at a slight angle once more at those words.

 

Was he interested in Rachel?

 

“Give it here.”

“What?”

Ian proudly held out his hand.

 

For a moment, there was a look of astonishment on Rachel’s face. 

 

“You want this?”

 

A fierce sense of frustration was revealed on her face, as Ian reached out once again.

 

“But, but this! I received it.”

“So?”

 

Even as he tried to take Rachel’s necklace, he was endlessly confident.

 

“But. He told me to keep it safe and that it would grant my wish.”

“Wish?”

Ian’s face cooled down at Rachel’s words.