Be Fascinated - Chapter 17

Chapter 17

After Claude left, Philia, who was dressed, smiled to herself. It’s not the dark blue you’ve seen often, nor the too bright sky blue, it’s a subtle blue. Philia really liked this outfit.

“Paula, I want to take a walk in the garden today.”

If you wear pretty clothes, of course you’d want to go out. Philia decided to take a walk in the garden. This blue dress in the sun will definitely have a beautiful luster.

She began to wander the garden with an energetic heart. In the garden, there were the flowers she liked.

“You don’t want to get out of here?”

At Paula’s question, Philia shook her head.

“It’s fun to go out, but I don’t want to leave.”

Philia was well aware of her identity. She didn’t want anyone to recognize her. What would she do if she met any priests in the capital? If she met any of the nobles who were worshiping… She had to be careful of certain places.

Especially with the priests looked at her with contempt if they knew what she was doing.

They were the ones who abandoned her just because she wasn’t the saint, but it was painful to imagine them seeing her like that.

She’d rather have a garden view. The garden was sufficient.

How gorgeous and beautiful this garden is than the temple garden. She realized that she likes things more flashy than she thinks.

It was not a worldly desire for material things, but a longing for bright and clear things. Because she has always lived in a place where there is little color.

She doesn’t have to go out. As she began to trust Claude more, her heart became calm. Philia could even hum.

It was when she put her hand on a brilliantly colored red rose.

“Careful…”

“Ah!”

Before Paula could finish speaking, she was pierced by a thorn. Red blood flowed from her fingers.

“Hold on, I’ll bring you some medicine.”

“No, I’m fine!”

But Paula didn’t listen. Philia blamed herself for having an accident.

“Silly…”

Philia looked at the drops of blood dripping from her fingers. It was the same color as the rose. As she blew her bitter hand, a sound was heard.

“Hmm…?”

A voice that sounds like men are arguing. Philia had a puzzled expression on her face. She thinks it’s coming from the front door of this mansion…

Philia walked towards it. And the one who is fighting the gatekeepers at the door…

“Reverend Irik?”

Philia’s body stiffened. Irik lifted his head and looked at Philia beyond the gate.

“Philia!”

“Go back!”

“Ohhh! Who refuses the visit of a High Priest!”

“This is the master’s order!”

“Didn’t I tell you that His Highness allowed me to come?! Philia!”

She looked at Irik’s desperate face. It was as if he was asking for help. Come to think of it, why did he come alone without any priests who followed him? Philia tilted her head to the side.

“Philia, please! Let’s just talk. Just once is fine!”

What should she do? Philia was worried. She didn’t want to see Irik’s face. After all, isn’t he the one who serves the ‘real’ saint in the empty place without her?

But Philia knew that it was a childish feeling. It was only natural that he worshiped the real saint. He went to jail because of her and she couldn’t drive him into this childish feelings.

“Tell him to come in.”

At Philia’s words, the gatekeepers looked at her.

“But the Master…”

“He has decided to entrust everything in this mansion to me.”

Philia said softly. The gatekeeper hesitated.

“It wouldn’t be good to know how you treated the High Priest. I will take care of it.”

“But Miss…”

“He is my guest.”

Philia’s words were difficult to refuse. Here, if they ignore her words, the ‘owner of the mansion’ may be angry with them. It didn’t look good afterwards

Also, if it was a problem that they treated the high priest as Philia said, it was also dangerous.

However, they had an order not to let any rats come close. Their ‘master’s word is absolute.

“Hey, are you imprisoning Philia now? What are you doing?”

Even the high priest looked at the gatekeepers with blazing eyes. If the high priest takes the ‘imprisonment’ issue as a case, they will surely get into trouble.

“Do I have to get permission to meet my people?”

The commands conflicted. On top of that, Claude insisted that Philia act so that she wouldn’t feel trapped.

“No. Excuse me.”

They couldn’t hold out any longer. The gatekeepers opened the door.

* * * 

Irik was looking at Philia. She was different from the Philia he had known before. She had always been dressed in white or gray, but now she was dressed in an intense blue hue.

Not just in appearance. She had always had a thin impression, but she seemed to have been refined. Just like women on the ‘outside’. Philia, who was the saint, was also beautiful, but now Philia is even more beautiful.

If it were all the men, perhaps they would have looked back at her at least once.

“You have changed a lot.”

“Yes, Reverend.”

Philia lowered her eyes and spoke quietly.

“You must be very angry.”

“I have no right to be angry.”

It was Philia’s sincerity. Seeing this, Irik’s face was dimly dyed. Her outward appearance has changed slightly, but her inside has remained the same. She was a gentle and kind-hearted saint, that was the Philia that Irik knew.

“I thought you would understand me.”

He’s not apologizing, and he’s not even touching her heart. Philia was very slightly disappointed at Irik’s attitude of accepting it right away.

“Philia, I still can’t believe they claim that you’re fake.”

“…….”

‘Even though you think that way, you turned towards the real saint.’

Philia was startled by the thoughts coming out of her own mind.

“I am going to find a way.”

“Don’t do that. Because I am a fake.”

“Philia. Don’t think like that. Why do you think I bowed my back to you as your high priest? It is for you.”

“…….”

“Philia, you are real.”

There was not a single question of doubt in Irik’s eyes. His eyes were clearly those of her ‘side’ on which she relied. However, Philia who came to the temple became a little unfamiliar with him.

“Reverend Irik. I may not be a saint. You have to think about that.”

“Philia. I know you’re angry, but don’t say that.”

“There’s a possibility. Reverend Irik”

“However…”

“Because we’re friends? Or is it because of Reverend Irik’s power?”

“You, what…”

“Or do I hold no value if I am not the saint?”

At Philia’s question, Irik gave a piercing expression on his face. He was curious about Philia. Why was she denying the possibility that she is not fake?

“That’s… not true.”

Irik clenched his teeth and said. Seeing Irik who had lost his spirit, it was Philia who was rather surprised. She had never pushed him this way. But why…

“I’m sorry.”

“…….”

“I must have been too sensitive. I didn’t mean to push you.”

Philia politely apologized. Irik smiled brightly.

“No, Philia. Rather, it makes me feel better when you get angry.”

“…….”

“Yes, you have to think about the possibility that it isn’t right. That’s right. But when I see you, I think of you as the ‘saint’.”

“…….”

“So, Philia, let’s go back.”

At Irik’s kind words, Philia widened her eyes.

“Where?”

“Anywhere. I will make a shelter near the temple.”

Philia looked at Irik’s face. Why does this person’s eyes overlap with Claude’s? Was it because she gave Irik affection in the temple?

“No. I am not going.”

Philia shook her head. If only Irik had come a little earlier. No, if she hadn’t seen him at that time, she might have taken Irik’s hand and followed him. But now there was no place for her beside him.

She wanted to believe that she was the saint, but if she went to Irik’s side, she would only become a thorn at his side. And…

“Philia, I don’t care if you refuse because you’re a nuisance. The High Priest has a lot of funds to manage. You are the one I…”

“No, I want to stay here.”

“Did the Crown Prince give such an order?”

Philia opened her eyes wide. After all, he knew about her and had come to find her. Philia let out a sigh.

“It’s not an order.”

“Even meeting me requires permission from the gatekeeper. You are a child raised nobly in the temple. Why the hell do you have to ask for permission?”

“That’s right, of course, because he is the owner of this house. And in the end, you met me anyway.”

At Philia’s words, Irik was speechless.

“Are you going to keep living here while walking on eggshells around him?”

“I don’t walk on eggshells around him. I never did.”

“Philia. You were reluctant in front of the Prince.”

That’s right. Philia flinched.

“Tell me more. Are you being threatened by him? Even the Crown Prince of the Empire cannot do this to you. I can help you.”

Irik said desperately. Philia’s heart warmed at Irik’s concern. Still, he cared for her like a brother. Well, she’d rather be honest.

“There is no such thing as intimidation. I‘m staying here because I want to.”

“…You want to?”

“Yes. He helped me out when I was in trouble.”

“…Then? What do you mean?”

At Irik’s words, Philia carefully opened her mouth.

“I adore His Majesty.”

At Philia’s words, Irik’s eyes widened. Philia couldn’t help it when she saw Irik, shaken up by what she said.

“Don’t say nonsense! What kind of love could the saint possibly—?!”

Irik yelled at Philia. As she flinched, he said with a sigh.

“What does that mean?”

“It’s just like I said, I like His Highness. There was a time when I saw him in the temple and was terrified. However…”

“Philia, come to your senses!”

Eric grabbed her shoulder. Why was she making that face? It’s like she’s been brainwashed. Why?

“He likes me too.”

“Haa. I’m going crazy.”

Irik raised the corners of his lips. He looked at her Philia with a smirk.

“Philia, you’re so naive.”

Tsk, when he looked at Philia, he clicked his tongue, and she opened her eyes wide. As Philia showed him an unfamiliar side, Irik also showed an unfamiliar side to her. He had a cold laugh.

“That’s it, it’s because you’re rare.”

“Rare?”

“Let’s say you are fake, but you were a saint. A woman pure and clean, untouched by men.”

“…….”

“Do you know how much the men outside salivate over you? The same goes for the Crown Prince.”

“…….”

“If you can’t have it, you want it even more. You are such a being, Philia.”

At Irik’s words, Philia’s heart sank.

“Because you are different from other women. Because you are a pure, clean, spotless woman who knows no filth. How crazy it drives the guys out there.”

Philia’s heart was pounding.

“Brother… Irik.”

“Philia.”

Philia’s face turned pale. She bit her lip.

“I will just stay here.”

“Philia! What I’m saying now…!”

“The high priest is now calling…”

How did you look at me? Philia trusted Claude. She also doubted him once. But she wouldn’t say that without seeing Claude smiling.

“You are thinking lowly of me right now.”

“Philia! Wake up. He couldn’t reach you before, but now he has reached you and locked you up—”

“Don’t talk of His Highness like that!”

Philia exclaimed. Irik was startled by Philia’s sharp voice. Tears welled up on Philia’s face. Irik’s words wounded her.

────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────