I Confessed To The Crossdresser - Chapter 6

It’s been three days since I last talked to Leto. Even though I shared the same room with him!

During classes, he sat alone, and I also no longer insisted on sitting next to him or chasing after him. My classmates that noticed this were happy and congratulated me, but I felt a little uncomfortable. Was it really okay to end everything like this?

‘What do I do next?’

It was also the third day that I ate my bread alone in the cafeteria. The other kids invited me to eat with them, but I didn’t feel like being with them. I was idly munching on my bread, when a plate was placed in front of me.

“What’s wrong, Bree?”

It was none other than Kazen who talked to me. I haven’t gotten to know him yet, but Kazen quietly sat down in front of me, probably worried.

If this continued, the eyes would be drawn to me once again.

“I’m fine.”

“Where’s Leah?”

He seemed to be worried about Leto, too. I also didn’t know where Leto was. We had the same lunchtime, but he hadn’t shown up in the cafeteria for three days straight. I was also worried if he was eating well.

“I don’t know.”

“Did you guys fight?”

“…….”

When I nodded my head slightly, Kazen laughed. No, we fought, so why are you laughing?

“You had a fight with Leah. I thought you guys were friends.”

“I guess that’s just my opinion.”

He sighed deeply and said.

“Actually, I’m Leah’s childhood friend.”

“I know that, obviously.”

“You knew?”

When he asked, I finally came to my senses.

“Oh, no. I just thought so.”

“Anyway, I was surprised since it was the first time someone was around Leah. To be honest, I was relieved. Leah is……a child who has been alone since young. She grew up in a less fortunate family. So she’s a bit cranky and sensitive, but on the inside, it was not like that.”

I nodded at Kazen’s words.

Kazen watched Leto from a distance, but he was also the one who witnessed all the tragedy first hand. What kind of life he lived, what he’s been subjected to…….

Kazen grinned as he saw me pondering. At Kazen’s smile, I slightly leaned my head forward, feeling the gazes of the people around me. 

“Thank you for telling me about Leah. But don’t laugh so much.”

“Huh? Why?”

“Because the other kids might get jealous. You…..well, you’re handsome and popular.”

When I told him the truth, Kazen froze and suddenly laughed out loud.

“You’re a little blind, aren’t you?”

“What?”

“If you look at it that way, then I’m actually in more danger. You’re popular, too.”

I tilted my head at his words.

“What are you talking about?”

“You didn’t know? You’re pretty. Aren’t all the men looking at you?”

Maybe it was just because I hung out with Leto? Leto was much prettier than most women.

“Bree, you’re pretty.”

Kazen said firmly, as if to remind me. I could feel my cheeks getting hotter from these unfamiliar words.

“…I didn’t know.”

“Anyway, I’ve said everything I needed to say, so I’ll get going now. I hope everything goes well with Leah.”

He got up after saying what he had to say. As soon as he left his seat, my mind got complicated again. Even if I was hated, wouldn’t it be the right thing to save everyone as well as saving Leto?

Then, reconciling with Leto was my priority. How should I reconcile? It was best to head over to the garden first. I shoved the sausages into my mouth.

＊  ＊  ＊

“Are you going to propose?”

The gardener said, looking at me holding a bunch of roses.

“No, I fought with my friend.”

“Yes…… I see. But I think if you give those roses, your relationship with your friend would get even worse.”

The gardener retorted, as if my method appeared ridiculous.

“Really? I think I’ll be fine.”

I was dressed in white, which I did not normally wear, and holding roses. I thought everything was perfect. Now all I needed to do was place these roses in the dorm bed or in a drawer. Since we had a big fight in the first place, wouldn’t it be better to make it grand?

I was seriously contemplating whether to call my friends from the art department and make an orchestra. Oh, of course I should write a letter too. Wouldn’t Leto be touched if I wrote around 6 pages long? I was genuinely conflicted.

‘Should I write six or seven pages?’

I felt the gardener’s gaze and opened my mouth.

“We had a big fight. So, I wanted to make the best apology.”

“Oh, my.”

The gardener said as if the situation was really pathetic.

“Oh, it wasn’t that bad of a fight. I didn’t tear any hair off…….”

“I’m not sorry that you fought, I’m sorry for the friend who will soon be receiving the apology from you.”

“Why?”

When I asked, the gardener looked at me as if I really didn’t know.

“Flowers are a little off, use this instead.”

The gardener handed me a letter. It was a small piece of paper that was the size of my palm.

“It’s too small. Don’t you think I need six sheets of paper of this size?”

“Are you trying to write a reflection essay?”

“That’s not it.….”

“Usually, apples need to be short and thick to be eaten.” [1]

I came to my senses as if I had been hit hard on the back of my head by the gardener’s words. Apples are short and thick! I see! The gardener laughed and patted me on the back when I understood what he was saying.

“Yeah, so put the roses down. That’s much better. And don’t write too much, just do five lines.”

“Thank you.”

“You really should thank me more. Otherwise, you’ll never be able to make up with that friend for the rest of your life.”

The gardener emphasised to never give the roses. In the end, I put down the roses, accepted the tiny letter from the gardener and returned back to the dormitory. Fortunately, Leto was not in the dormitory. In the meantime, I was going to quickly write a letter.

‘How should I write this?’

I would rather write a six page long letter since I had a lot to write about but it was difficult to make it short and meaningful. I couldn’t believe it should be only five lines. How do I convey my sorry feelings to Leto in five lines? Ironically, I couldn’t think at times like this.

“What should I write? I’m sorry- that’s too obvious.”

I wanted to write it clearly. Short and meaningful…… short and meaningful…….

I was thinking seriously, and it took me a few minutes to write the first sentence. Fortunately, after writing the first sentence, I managed to quickly write down the other four sentences.

＊  ＊  ＊

Luckily, there was a major class after lunch. The {Basic Formula of Magic} class was held in the auditorium, instead of the laboratory. I took the letter and headed towards the auditorium.

Although I made my move, I was worried if I had written the letter well. Maybe I wrote too much? I didn’t think I could deliver a serious apology in a short but bold way, so I wrote it to make Leto smile as much as possible.

‘By the way, where’s Leto?’

After arriving at the auditorium, I looked around. It seems that Leto hasn’t arrived yet. I hoped this letter would be delivered to Leto smoothly. I sat at the very end, with the blackboard in the distance. I was quietly waiting for Leto when he came in and sat down on the seat far away from me.

Now, the question was how to deliver the letter to him.

At that time, I remembered I had learnt how to fly an object during a lesson. Since it was a basic magic, it meant that it could be done easily. Originally, magic was prohibited in the classroom, but I drew a small magic circle and recalled the spell.

【Keruum】

The letter floated above the magic circle and began to fly quietly. As I watched the letter float in the air, I prayed that it would reach Leto quickly. But the direction of the letter was a little strange. Contrary to my intentions, the letter did not lie in front of Leto, but twisted and landed on Leto’s head.

“……Oh.”

Who would ever think of putting an apology letter on the person’s head?

Leto felt something peculiar and shook his head. Leto found the reason when a letter fell in front of him. He frowned at the letter and turned his head towards me.

At this moment, I was not confident enough to make eye contact with Leto, so I turned my head away. I avoided his gaze for a second before turning my head back again. Thankfully, Leto was reading the letter without throwing it away. But what I wrote in the letter……. Did I wrote it well? Sighing, I recalled back the contents of the letter I had written. [2]

Le, Leah I’m sorry.

Ah, I’m very sorry.

I’m, I’m sorry. Never again.

So, I’ll behave.

Really, I promise you.

I wrote a very juicy acrostic poem.

[1] Apples (사과) and Apology (사과) have the same letter but two different meanings. In short, it’s a saying that apologies should be short but meaningful.

[2] I altered it to make sense in English but the original creative poem she made was ;

레 (Le), 레아야 미안해. (leah mianhae)

아 (Ah), 아주 미안해. (aju mianhae)

미 (Mi), 미안해. 다시는, (mianhae. dasineoun)

안 (An), 안 그럴게. (an geoleoge)

해 (Hae), 해를 걸고 약속해. (haeleol geolgo yagsoghae)

레아 미안해 – “Leah, I’m sorry.”