I Don’t Want to Win Lying Down

Chapter 38: Deadly Buffalo Wings Challenge

Translator: EndlessFantasy Translation

Editor: EndlessFantasy Translation

“Students! At the end of this month, you will be undertaking one of the most rigorous tests. The entirety of the Year 3 students in the province will be taking the same exam on the same days, and the difficulty will be at the level of the university entrance exams. I hope that you will seize this opportunity!”

“Of course…” Lin Yishan said, pausing for a moment before he continued quietly, “Before the dawn of a war, you will have a night out to unwind. Tomorrow, our school will hold its annual gourmet festival. I hope that everyone will enjoy and have fun.”

As soon as he finished saying that, the class burst out into laughter and chatter.

The so-called gourmet festival was basically a group of Year 1 and Year 2 students setting up stalls to sell food under the supervision of their class teachers. At first, the purpose of it was simple, and that was to let the students experience the cruelty of society, however…it had completely backfired. Not only did the students not feel the cruelty of society, but it had also become an event that all the students looked forward to instead.

Since then, the gourmet festival had become a major feature of this school. There were even some students who purposely took the entrance exam for this school in order to experience the so-called campus gourmet festival.

In the afternoon, at the school gates, Xu Mang and Yang Xiaoman stood in a corner away from the crowd, waiting for the Maybach to pick them up. Initially, it was just to pick up Yang Xiaoman, but Xu Mang had a thick face, and he insisted for her to send him home on the way today.

“Don’t you usually like taking the bus?” Yang Xiaoman asked Xu Mang as she glanced around, and then said quietly, “I used to let you ride with me but you used to be so reserved about it. Now you’re just trying to act like something else?

“…hehe, don’t think too much about it!” Xu Mang said as he laughed nervously. The reason for this humiliating favor was because he had lost his bus card, and unfortunately for him, he had written his name and class on it, so when he finally found it in the corner of the dumpster, someone had cut the card in half, and even the copper wire within it had been destroyed.

It was obvious that someone had done it intentionally.

As to why he had so many enemies in school, Xu Mang had considered it before. It could possibly be due to his bad academic performance, but that was not the most important factor.

“Xiaoman? Do you think I’m a bad person?” Xu Mang asked.

“You? No, you’re not bad.” Yang Xiaoman replied, smiling widely. “You’re the worst!”

Xu Mang was taken aback and his brain short-circuited for a moment as he raised his left hand toward Yang Xiaoman’s chest area, hovering in front of it before covering it, and he asked, “What about now? Am I bad?”

Yang Xiaoman: （╬￣皿￣）

***

On Saturday morning, Xu Mang didn’t head to school. He first had to get a replacement bus card, and then he took a cab to school. Just as he reached the school gate, he saw the teachers leading the students in while they carried various cooking tools.

“Che, after doing this and that, it all still ends up with them making dumplings…” Xu Mang couldn’t help but scoff as he saw the teachers and students. Some classes were like that. Take Year 3 Class 2 for example, two years ago, they had made celery and pork dumplings. Last year, they had made shepherd’s purse and pork dumplings.

That was still barely tolerable!

Two years ago, the soup was filled with MSG and salt. Last year, they had directly poured soy sauce into it…of course, that was still tolerable.

However, ten bucks for three dumplings were a bit excessive!

Those rich kids with silver spoons in their mouths could obviously tolerate this kind of pricing, however, the main problem was the dumpling skins.

Xu Mang vaguely remembered spending ten bucks to buy the dumplings from Class 2 two years ago and taking a bite into them, but in the end, he still had ‘2 kilometers’ left before he reached the filling. In fact…this was still also endurable, because after that ‘2 kilometers’, there would be meat.

However…last year’s dumplings were a more obvious con to profit. A piece of dough and leaf…it just tasted like soy sauce in your mouth.

Alright, just be a bit more patient!

However, the price increased further!

Ten bucks for two dumplings!

“Haha! I, Xu Mang, will swear today!” Xu Mang pointed to the blue skies above him, and declared in a sonorous voice, “Even if you beat me and kill me, I will not eat the things that you make!”

After taking the oath, Xu Mang headed toward the classroom.

There was no helping it, he was a Year 3 student after all.

After spending the entire morning slacking off, Xu Mang realized that he was hungry. As he looked around the classroom, he found that it completely empty apart from himself and the flat-chested barbarian.

“Where is everyone?”

“What do you think, even daring to ask where everyone is…” Yang Xiaoman leveled a glare at him and continued in an obviously disgruntled voice, “Everyone has gone to the gourmet festival. You’re the only moron that continued to sleep on…don’t you know I’m very hungry?”

Xu Mang: o(╯□╰)o

This woman must have been sent down by the heavens to torture me! You clearly know that you are hungry, why didn’t you go down to the gourmet festival with everyone else?

By the tone of her voice, it was apparently his fault!

“Uh…shall we go to the festival together?” Xu Mang tested the waters.

“That’s what I’ve been waiting for you to say!”

***

Xu Mang and Yang Xiaoman walked with a three-meter distance between them, it wasn’t a mandatory rule or anything, it was just to avoid any nasty gossip. After all, gossips were the root of murders most of the time.

@LifeInPieces: [I want to eat smelly tofu!]

@LifeInPieces: [I want to eat fried bananas!]

@LifeInPieces: [I want to eat ravioli!]

@TheDreamOfAllFemalesInThe Universe: [Oh…]

This was how the communication between the two continued, with Yang Xiaoman using WeChat to inform Xu Mang what she wanted to eat, and Xu Mang would buy the food. They would then head to the abandoned washroom on the fifth floor of Building A to make the trade.

When Yang Xiaoman came out of the abandoned washroom with a satisfied face, Xu Mang suddenly had a burst of inspiration.

“Did you eat your fill?”

“Uh-huh!”

“Did it smell good?”

“Yup!”

Not five seconds later, Yang Xiaoman finally realized the implications behind the conversation.

After a round of beating, Xu Mang and Yang Xiaoman continued their food hunting journey. Only, in this entire process, Xu Mang had not eaten a single thing.

“Eh? Why are you not eating?”

As the time passed, the distance between the two had lessened, and Yang Xiaoman asked the question from where she stood beside Xu Mang.

“I’m waiting for the Buffalo Wings Challenge tonight.” Xu Mang replied. “Our school has a program, a deadly buffalo wings competition. As long as you pay a 50 bucks registration fee, you can eat unlimited amounts of buffalo wings. The one who eats the most will be crowned the Spicy King.

“There’s still a program like this? The one who initiated this must be some unstable person!” Yang Xiaoman retorted.

“No!” Xu Mang defended it, shaking his head vehemently as he said solemnly, “This is a deadly type of buffalo wings, ordinary people can’t stand even one lick of the spiciness. Currently, the highest record in our school is 17.”

Yang Xiaoman’s mouth had opened to retort, but no words came out. She really wanted to know…what the h*ll was wrong with this school?

“You…you’re planning on taking the challenge?” Yang Xiaoman asked instead, surprise evident in her voice as she looked at Xu Mang.

“Yup! I want the championship. I’m going to break the current record and also to leave an outcome that will leave the previous record holders in complete anguish to the point that they can’t even cry any tears over it!” Xu Mang replied, a dignified expression on his face as his eyes held a faraway look, as though he had revealed a masterful accomplishment.

Yang Xiaoman was dumbfounded. This was the first time she had seen such a serious side of Xu Mang. She couldn’t help but feel the whispers tug on the dark corner of her heart at the scene.

That was insane!

“Are you sure you’ll be fine?” Yang Xiaoman asked, doubt creeping into her voice. “Don’t get admitted to the hospital when the time comes.”

“Che! It’s not just bragging.” Xu Mang said dismissively as he pointed to the chair near them. “Give me a bowl of spicy noodles now, and would you believe that I can eat that chair?”