I Thought I Didn’t Have Long To Live! - Chapter 52

Chapter 52 (I’m Leaving Now)

Lariette opened her eyes and stared at Doha’s face. It was an expression that she had never seen before.

His face, who was always confident and confident, was full of embarrassment. His golden eyes fluttered endlessly, and his white skin was dyed pink.

The corners of his lips fluttered as if they were about to curve upwards. It looked like he was in a good mood or he was surprised.

“Doha, don’t look at it. Just look at my face, huh?”

Lariette decided that Doha was shocked to see people die. For him, who had only grown up nicely in the temple, it must have been very surprising.

Mistaking it, she held Doha’s face firmly with both hands. It was to fix his gaze on herself. Then his skin seemed to heat up even more.

“You were very surprised. It’s okay, everything will be okay.”

Lariette tried to reassure Doha with a soft voice. Just as he reassured me in the past when I was afraid that rumors about me would get into my parents’ ears. I wanted to help him.

Doha licked his lips for a moment and looked at Lariette. Red drops of blood flowed down the white cheeks. She wiped the blood with the back of her hand as if nothing had happened.

Illustration 

The bloodstains were not easily erased and remained clearly visible. And the red marks on his face looked particularly beautiful to Doha.

‘I, you….’

Doha recalled the sentence that came to mind without even knowing it.

It was a thought that naturally came to him like that when he runs, he gets thirsty, and when the night comes, he falls asleep.

‘I love you?’

Its naturalness was very embarrassing to Doha. No, it was beyond embarrassment and fear.

Did I love someone? It was nonsense. It was something that should never have happened.

‘It’s an illusion. It must be an illusion.’

Although he realized his feeling, he desperately denied that feeling. He didn’t want to admit that he loved her.

It must have been that he exaggeratedly reacted because he was thrilled to see Lariette killing people, and because it was so interesting. Doha made excuses for himself.

It was because the memory of the past came like a wave and mercilessly attacked him at every moment he was about to admit it.

– Doha. I love you.

The first thing that came to mind was that warm voice. The friendly moment when someone whispered love in his ear with a soft tone was still vivid.

– I really love you.

I couldn’t forget the subtle scent that wafted from that person’s skin. It was an unusual scent, but it was so special to him.

That made him even more resentful and hateful. That lowly person who betrayed him, that light love was disgusting.

‘Sounds like love.’

So he couldn’t love anyone like that. Laughter at himself leaked through his thin lips.

“I’m fine, Rie.”

Doha answered with a relaxed expression on his face again. Then he grabbed her shoulder and sang a light spell.

Then, the bloodstains that had stained Lariette’s skin all over began to be erased slowly. With his power, he was able to purify not only the body with blood stains but also her clothes, as if nothing had happened with his divine power.

“Thank you for saving me. Had it not been for Rie, it would have been a disaster. I survived thanks to you.”

Doha shook his head and expressed his gratitude. In fact, there was no danger even if she didn’t come, but it was meant to relieve even a little bit of guilt.

Lariette replied with a smile. She would normally be playful and brazen, but her heart was heavy for that. It was because she thought that there was still a body lying behind her.

“Should you go home now?”

“Well, let’s do that.”

“I’ll take you to the carriage.”

Doha grabbed Lariette’s shoulder with one arm and moved forward. His large body obscured her vision, so she couldn’t see the horrific sight.

Lariette quietly moved as he led. If it were her, she would have been burdened with this kind of skinship, but now she desperately needed a hand to hold her.

When they got to the carriage, Doha climbed into the carriage and escorted her until the last time she sat down on a chair. Then he knelt in front of her and looked at her with serious eyes.

“Rie.”

“Yes?”

Lariette answered with a puzzled expression as if she had come all the way into the carriage. A playful voice continued.

“He was an assassin who came to kill me. Judging from what you’re saying, he’s already killed several people.”

“Assassin? Who, assassin to Doha…?”

“… I said I found a mine in the house? It’s only natural that sudden luck can lead to anger. There is nothing to worry about, Rie”

Doha smiled and naturally lied. It was obvious that guy sent the assassin. It was the same reason it was sent.

What he said wasn’t entirely wrong. The power he had, the power must have caused anger. And he had no intention of delay it any longer.

Lariette raised her eyebrows and gave a worried look. It would be a lie if she had never been in danger as the only princess of Duke Blanche, but Doha looked too weak and fragile to face such malice.

I knew his superior healing powers and the power to create defensive barriers, but he always seemed so fragile that it could break at any moment. It didn’t seem like it was just because of his delicate face.

“The important thing is that he was the one to die for, and you’re my savior.”

“…… ”

“Remember that, Rie.”

Doha stared straight at Lariette without blinking an eye. His gaze was so serious and friendly, it felt as if the heartbeat, which had been pounding incessantly, slowly subsided.

Lariette smiled as she rolled her eyes lightly. Knowing what he was trying to say made me feel more at ease.

“Yes. Thanks, Doha.”

Lariette reached out slowly toward his face. A soft finger touched his hard skin.

Her thumb rubbed Doha’s cheek. It was to wipe the drops of blood that had splattered on his face. It was nothing more than a light kindness to her.

However, for Doha, who barely made up his mind, the action was not light. The hard-earned stability was broken so easily.

Suddenly, her face felt too close. It felt like a tickling sensation was strangling his neck.

Thump, Thump, Thump.

His heart was beating all over his body. He could feel the palpitations in his chest and the tips of his fingers.

‘No no.’

Doha bit his lower lip until it bled, trying to calm himself. But no matter how much he thought and bit his lip, he couldn’t control his heartbeat.

I wanted to grab that wrist that was rubbing my face without meaning. I wanted to let you know how dangerous you are now and how my heart reacts to that touch.

It was an absurd idea. It was difficult to be so rude in order to continue to extract her useful abilities.

Doha was a man who knew how to persevere for what he wanted. But strangely, this time the patience was too difficult.

“Go.”

Doha bowed his head and muttered softly.

“Go away now, Rie.”

Before I can’t stand it and eat you. Doha bit his lip and swallowed.

However, after letting Lariette go and returning to the temple, he could not acknowledge the raging emotions, and he continued to suffer.

* * *

‘I killed a man.’

Lariette closed her eyes tightly and tried to think differently. But the thought that once came to her came back like an echo and tormented her.

‘I killed someone.’

Haha.. hah… Lariette took a breath. My stomach was so stuffy I couldn’t stand it.

It was not the first time seeing death.

Lariette was a high-ranking aristocrat, and this meant that she faced various threats. The same was true of death threats. And that she survived all those threats meant that everyone who threatened her had been eliminated.

The scene where the bodyguard cuts off the head of the assassin who attacked her. A scene where a commoner screams for struggle and jumps into her carriage and dies. Even the scene where Asrazan kills the knights of the Marquis of Segreb to save her. There were many things that came to mind.

However, she never killed anyone herself.

“Lariette, are you here?”

As soon as Lariette got off the carriage, Asrazan came to meet her with a bright smile. Since, when he had been waiting for her, the hand holding her was cold.

‘You can’t make Asrazan worry.’

Lariette thought as she looked at his friendly face. I didn’t want to worry him. Even if not, it was because he was busy with work these days and had to go to the Palace from time to time.

“Asrazan, why did you wait when the wind was cold? Let’s hurry up and go in.”

Lariette smiled brightly and wrapped her hands around his hands and rubbed them gently. The night breeze was not so cold as if summer was approaching, but she was trembling in fear that her precious lover might catch a cold.

Asrazan did not respond and looked at her carefully. At the moment when Lariette was embarrassed, a sharp question followed.

“… What happened?”

“Yes?”

“You don’t have to force yourself to smile.”

Dark complexion, slightly trembling body. The difference was obvious to Asrazan. It made him sad and upset that I refused to tell him, even though it was clear that something had happened.

Asrazan reached out a hand that was not caught by her and gently wrapped it around Lariette’s cheek. A rough thumb rubbed her trembling lips.

“What made you suffer?”

Blue eyes flashed in the sharp eyes.

Obviously, today was the day she met that Priest. She said she was going to see the city with her friends.

I didn’t like the idea of meeting him, but I didn’t say anything because I was so jealous that Lariette’s heart would cool down. The result is Lariette’s melancholy.

I wanted to grab that shiny hair and cut off his neck right away.

On the other hand, Lariette, who did not know that Asrazan had such terrible thoughts, looked up at him with her pupils shaking.

‘I guess you really like me…’

I was really grateful for his kind heart, who quickly recognized my condition even though I had fully demonstrated the acting skills I had learned as a princess.

Suddenly, my heart started pounding. It was as if a pounding heart could be heard in my ears. Rather than a fluttering and pleasant feeling, it was a feeling of throbbing pain and tingling in my chest.

“Nothing happened, really.”

Asrazan’s eyes narrowed at Lariette’s answer. It was his eyes that could tell if it was a lie or not.

“Because it’s true. Hurry up and go get some dinner. I am hungry.”

“… All right.”

Asrazan escorted Lariette without further questioning. But as he moved, his gaze turned to her back for a moment. It was where Gerard was hiding.

Gerard hid himself in the dark and shook his head quietly. Contrary to her words, it was an action that meant something had happened. At that moment, blue veins stood on Asrazan’s temple.

If she didn’t want to say it, then she wouldn’t have to say it. If she lied because she was worried about his busy schedule, her heart was also lovely.

‘But that doesn’t mean you can’t help but recognize anything.’

Asrazan gave a brief chin to Gerard.

All the materials would be ready on his table by the end of the night.

* * *

The dining room of Duke Kandel mansion.

To welcome the dinner we have been together for a long time, the table was filled with more plentiful food and colorful decorations than usual.

Lariette exclaimed in admiration. A proud smile appeared on Halstein’s face.

Asrazan silently pushed some plates closer to her. All of them were foods that Lariette wanted to eat.

Although it was a little kindness, Lariette felt her heart beating again.

The only things she said she liked and disliked were salmon and cucumbers when we went on a picnic. Even so, to fully understand my tastes meant that he had looked closely at me. Even since we started dating, there hasn’t been a single cucumber on the table.

Lariette looked at him with emotion throughout the meal. After realizing it, all of his actions were very kind.

“Cough.. Master… lady.”

Near the end of the meal, Halstein coughed and spoke. Since he was usually not a person to talk to during a meal as a courtesy, Lariette listened to him with her eyes wide open.

“It’s off topic, but I prepared a small gift for the two of you.”

“A gift?”

“Yeah, it’s not really a big deal.”

As Halstein blinked at the servant behind him, he quickly ordered the other servant. Soon after, a servant in the kitchen came out with a large tray.

What he put on the table was a large cake. It was so beautiful that the tea was made with much more effort than the dessert cake I usually ate.

And these words were written on the cake.

’50 days ♥’

After reading the text, Asrazan sighed as he wiped his face with his hand. His butler, who did something he wasn’t even told to do, was absurd and full of excitement.

Halstein shamelessly avoided Asrazan’s gaze and just smiled.

“It is said that young people these days take care of these things. I baked it myself. I hope it suits your taste.”

I would like to take care of the 500 days as well as the 5000 days! Halstein struggled to refrain from filling the bowl.

Asrazan glanced away to confirm Lariette’s reaction. She was smiling brightly.

“Thank you so much, Halstein!”

Lariette answered in a bright voice. Fortunately, thanks to the puffy dress, the state of her frozen body was not detected.

Thump, Thump, Thump.

My heart was beating like crazy. As before, it wasn’t a pleasant palpitation. Rather, it was more of a pain.

50 days. Has time passed like that?

There was only about a month left to spend with Asrazan.

The heart palpitations continued to intensify. The heartbeat was so loud that I couldn’t hear anything.

Only the explanations from the doctors I had once heard buzzed in my head.

– Especially… Does your heart feel like it’s beating faster? You feel like you can hear your own heartbeat.

He said that as the disease progresses, it gets worse. If I make a mistake and proceed even a little faster, my body may explode in front of Asrazan’s eyes and die. As long as I liked him, I had to leave before I showed him that way.

In other words, the time to leave was approaching.