Is this Hero for Real? - Chapter 18
Chapter 18
[Act 6] The Green Pig
“So what was your name again?”
“Kogmos.”
We ended the conversation, retracing our friendship transcending species, and set out
again.
This demon’s name was Kogmos.
He was my fantasy translator.
“Nickname?”
“It’s my real name. My family tree is rather impressive, but… I’m the 23rd child of the
14th Demon King’s 348th wife, so there’s nothing to worry about.”
“Wow! You were a prince?”
“Humans put great value in a royal status, but to us, those in power monopolize their
spouses. Royals and nobles are quite common.”
“So you’re saying you’re a demon without even a decent facade.”
“…”
“Stop crying.”
“It’s all your fault!”
He made things quite difficult by dripping tears whenever I said something.
Were all demons in the fantasy world like Kogmos?
“Is your pet name Kogmo?”
“Mos. It’s a name the now 425th wife of the 7th Demon King… an old friend, gave to me. There wasn’t even a single word of congratulations to her breast-feeding her first
child…”
“Uh.. um… hang in there.”
Who didn’t have their own stories to tell in this world?
The demon’s circumstances of his pent-up issues with marriage was pitiful, but it wasn’t
as unfortunate as me getting kidnapped into a fantasy world.
That was my fifth day missing.
I had been torn away from my family.
My chest tightened thinking about how worried my parents on Earth would be.
[A certain god yawns loudly.]
[A certain god rolls around, enjoying the sunbath.]
The god was extremely uncomfortable whenever I got along with fairies or humans, but right then, they were ever so calm.
Just what was their standard?
“By the way, when are you using the bathroom? It didn’t look like you ate anything for
the past two days.”
“Oh! It’s already been two days, I see. Time goes by so fast.”
It also meant that the demon and I had spent two days in the forest together.
Is that how we bonded?
Not at all!
Species, cultures, hobbies, age…
There couldn’t be a normal conversation between two males without anything in
common or a connection.
“Don’t change the subject.”
“You didn’t eat or shit anything either.”
“I’m a demon. Don’t think of me as those inferior humans.”
“…”
“Stop crying.”
As we were talking about useless things, the infernal forest ended, and we could see a
sky blue plain.
The demon, with his eyes dried out, coldly explained.
“Once the forest ends, it’s the swordmasters’ Knight Kingdom. It’s also the orcs’ territory,
like I said before.”
“Orcs, you say…”
They weren’t an unfamiliar species.
They were in charge of raising the characters’ exp in fantasy novels, cartoons, and
movies.
But I couldn’t let my guard down.
There were quite a few works with a strange set-up like ‘orcs are actually nice’ for a
unique twist.
So I couldn’t be sure until I saw an orc in person.
“Oh! There’s one over there.”
While the gnolls’ habitat was a dense forest, orcs lived a small, nomadic lifestyle in a
vast plain.
I saw green pigs guiding cows and pigs.
“Sniff sniff. Smells like a human.”
“Give it up. They’re all males.”
“But we can still fill our stomachs.”
A biped pig following a biped hyena!
But the only pig-like thing was the head and fat belly.
Its arms and legs were like muscular logs, with solid pecs on its chest.
It was one of the versions of an orc I’d known on Earth.
“Oh, no… It’s all your fault.”
“What is?”
“Your eyes, they glow like a gnoll’s. Are you not aware how annoying that is on a night like this?”
“Aha!”
I had gotten too used to the power and forgot.
I thought I was unlucky because I ran into a group of orcs as soon as I entered their habitat, but it was really just the edgy effects.
“Do something about it… you bastard! Why didn’t you hide it if you already knew how
to!”
“It looked cool.”
—And I could see better in the dark.
Flash!
Reactivating the edgy effect, I looked straight at the group of orcs coming towards us.
One, two, three, four…
Ten green biped pigs pointed their weapons towards us.
“I see they’re relaxed.”
Gnolls would have screamed “meat” as they ran at us at full speed.
It didn’t seem like they were going to fight right away, but their stance wasn’t all that
gentlemanly either.
It was like they were looking down on us.
“Well, look at yourself.”
“What about me?”
“You look like a small-time mercenary exhausted from fighting all those gnolls. And yet,
you got a lot of riches with you.”
Demon Kogmos scolded me, pointing to my bag of trophies.
“Hm. Should I talk to them?”
“Do whatever you want.”
I wanted to beat up the demon’s face for looking ready to laugh at me, but I held it in
and took a step forward.
After all, I was a good, cultured citizen of the smoke-fill Earth—I loved peaceful solutions.
“Orc…”
“Skinny pig! Hand over everything you have!”
“…”
I didn’t think I’d be called a pig by a green pig.
“Skinny pig. Do you not know the pig language?”
“I’m a human, not a pig.”
“A pig speaks the orc’s tongue?”
[Hero]
It was thanks to the evil goddess’s curse, but was a human speaking an orc language
that big of a deal?
The orcs, taken aback, talked amongst themselves and cried in unison.
“Boar! Give us everything you have!”
“You’ll die if you don’t!”
“Present us the female hog, too!”
It was a much better vocabulary than those gnolls who only cried, “meat”!
But the contents of what they were saying weren’t all that different.
“…Guess I don’t have another choice.”
Demon Kogmos told me orcs were much stronger than gnolls.
And from the looks of it, they were used to working as a group for attacks or sieges.
Could I beat them?
I’d simply die if I couldn’t, but I wouldn’t die easily.
And above all…
[Outsider]
[Fairy]
“Hey, you green pigs! Hand over everything you got!”
“We are orcs! Not pi— oink?!”
“That’s what I should be telling you!”
‘We’ll settle who the actual pigs are!’
* * *
Translator – plvto
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* * *
After passing out from a concussion in the forest, Oh Hanwoo sprang up as soon as he
gained consciousness.
“What about the gnolls?!”
“…I took care of all of them.”
“Th-that’s a relief… Huh?”
He relaxed after listening to the beautiful voice nearby, but his train of thought completely stopped for a moment.
The girl was still beautiful.
But she wasn’t the same as before.
“What happened to your hand?!”
Her left hand was gone.
Her pretty, fair hand that was nothing like a mercenary’s was gone and was tightly
bandaged to stop the bleeding.
She hid her left arm to the side and said, “I made a mistake.”
“Because of me…?”
“No. I lost it because I let my guard down and looked elsewhere, so there’s no need to
blame yourself.”
“…”
That couldn’t be.
Even Oh Hanwoo knew how to read the room.
She must have lost it while trying to protect him and fight at the same time.
[Special]
He wasn’t like the main character at all.
It was pretty common for the main character to get help from a beautiful girl at the
beginning when he was weak, but at most, the damage would be her clothes ripping.
And even then, he would cover where her clothes ripped and ask, “did you see that?”
and move on.
But this…
“It’s common. Countless mercenaries retire like this. I’m just retiring a little early
because I was unlucky.”
“What?! This doesn’t make sense! I’m the main character?!”
“Sir Oh Hanwoo…?”
“W-wait a minute. There must be a way to treat your hand! Using my blessing… damn it!
I’ll acquire a blessing to solve this soon. This doesn’t make any sense otherwise!”
“…I’m happy enough with you being sad for me.”
“Happy?! How can you be so…!”
“It was my mistake, so please don’t blame yourself.”
“…”
‘She’s not holding the boy who ruined her life responsible?’
[Special]
The blessing’s effect didn’t make him happy.
Calling the girl strong would be an understatement, and Oh Hanwoo felt like he’d go
crazy listening to her.
[A certain god of wind falls off their cloud from laughing.]
[A certain immature god of dice asks how you’re feeling.]
[A certain god gives a thumbs up.]
The gods were gleeful, even in a serious situation like that.
“Stop laughing! Is this funny to you?”
[A certain god is displeased by you lashing out.]
[A certain god decides to teach you a quick lesson.]
“What?! Wait! Just wait…!”
Oh Hanwoo tried to clear the air after yelling at the Gods in a spurt of anger, but it was
too late.
[Name] Oh Hanwoo
[Level] 1
[Blessings] Hero F, Special F, Mercenary F
[Curses] See Through F
[Dividend] 2.55
Without a moment for him to beg for forgiveness, there was a curse added to his status
window.
It was an effect that would have been incredible in all sorts of ways if it was a blessing.
[See Through]
> You are unable to take a peek, even if there are no physical barriers!
> The chances of your weaknesses or secrets getting revealed increases significantly.
It was from then on…
Oh Hanwoo saw the beautiful girl’s breasts and bottom through a slightly foggy cloud as if it was censored.
‘…Did my eyesight get worse?’
Is what he thought for a moment, but her bittersweet face and surroundings all looked
clear.
“O-oh my god…”
This curse was too cruel for a vigorous young boy!
But he couldn’t complain. If he did, there would only be another curse.
Holding down his anger, hero Oh Hanwoo remembered a more important problem.
‘There must be a way… oh!’
“Sir Oh Hanwoo. Now that you’re awake, go back to a safe city for now. If the gnolls
come back, I can’t promise you’ll live through it next time.”
“Okay, and it’s not too late to lose hope.”
“Of course, since I’m still alive…”
“No! I didn’t mean it in such a depressing way! If you go to the city temple and ask the
Saintess, she can restore your lost hand!”
The solution Oh Hanwoo thought of was using the Saintess who could revive the dead.
But the girl’s face didn’t light up at all.
“That will be difficult. The Saintess doesn’t do anyone favors.”
“Don’t worry about that.”
“I’m not in the mood for jokes…”
“I’m also serious. This is a matter of your life, after all.”
“…”
Oh Hanwoo was sure he could change this crisis into an opportunity.
“I sincerely apologize for hiding my true identity this whole time.”
“Your true identity?”
“I’m a legendary hero. And you are the hero’s comrade. The Saintess will treat you at all
costs!”
***
The orcs’ armor was quite sturdy compared to the gnolls.
It looked silly, like an adult in children’s clothing, but they could pass off as a human if it
wasn’t for their face and skin.
And… of course…
“What the hell is this pig?!”
“Block him if you have the time to ask!”
“What? You try blocking him!”
The way I saw it, orcs and gnolls weren’t very different in terms of force required.
It took around the same amount of time for the strong force of the blue dagger to cut
open their stomachs.
The demon had lied to me.
“Do you not have any respect for the dead?! Orcs are stronger than gnolls. Don’t treat
them the same!”
“Respect, my ass.”
Unlike the gnolls who took a while to give up, I could get rid of every single orc thanks to
them abandoning their companions and running away as soon as they knew they had
the shorter end of the stick.
They were more annoying than the gnolls, for sure.
Stab-
“Oiiink~?!”
I wiped off the blood on the blue dagger from the last orc that went down while screaming its pig throat out.
I turned around and looked at demon Kogmos, who only sat back and watched that
whole time.
“Hey. If you’re accompanying me, shouldn’t you at least help… huh?”
Flare flare~
The demon’s bottom half was engulfed in white flames, quickly burning like a dry
firewood.
‘Isn’t that dangerous?’
Demon Kogmos spoke in a low voice with all the blood washed out from his face.
“L-look up at the sky.”
“The sky? Woah…”
At first, I thought it was an airplane, but that couldn’t be, this was a fantasy world.
It was a white dragon.
It was a fantasy creature with the body of a lizard and three pairs of wings.
“The Saintess is on there.”
“The Saintess?”
“As expected from humanity’s greatest weapon. I can’t believe she saw me from up
there and hit me perfectly… kirk! I was lucky. No, since I saw one of the two Saintesses
in the entire world, does that make me unlucky…?”
“Ha~”
The white dragon carrying the evil goddess’s pawn disappeared into the air.
‘Where did she go?’
“It’s the direction of the fairy kingdom. If it’s bad enough for the Saintess to take action, it
can’t be a small problem…”
“How about you worry about yourself first?”
If he was a human, he’d be dead by the time his bottom half was burnt and gone.
“…”
“Talk. Are you dead?”
“Carry me.”
“…”
“Don’t look at me like that! I don’t want to be carried by an inferior human either, but I
can’t heal a wound from a holy flame quickly.”
“Goddamnit…”
‘I’ll pay back the Saintess for this shame and humiliation someday.’