Is this Hero for Real? - Chapter 9

 

Is this Hero for Real?

Chapter 9

“Tell me, then. It’s not like I can’t listen to a dying man’s last words… hold on. The bugs are a bit loud.”

“Kyak?! ^%$#, ^%$# ^%$#…”

“Kirk! ^%$# ^%$#… kirk?!”

“^%$# ^%$# ^%$#, hak!”

The chief mercilessly whipped the fairies.

Crack! Crack! Crack…!

His innocent face resembled that of a mischievous child enjoying plucking the legs and wings off an insect. No matter how you looked at it, it wasn’t normal.

“…..”

“…..”

“…..”

“Finally, they’re quiet. You may speak now.”

He sounded like he was proud after a workout as he put down the weapon covered with the flesh and blood of the fairies.

Was he showing this to me on purpose?

I’m no psychologist or therapist, but he may have wanted a third party to acknowledge an act that he firmly believed was “justice.”

If so, I knew what to say next.

“It must have been hard, stoically walking a path no one understands.”

“…Are you empathizing with me?”

“It’s because I’m an outsider.”

“An outsider… a lone wolf dashing through the wild, did you say? I see. Was I also an outsider…?”

[A certain god confirms that’s not it.]

I didn’t think so either!

But did my plan of building rapport work?

The chief, feeling a sense of kinship with me, moved me to the side, away from the magic circle drawn in blood.

Oh! I might have a chance of surviving!

The Chief immediately proved what I was hoping for wrong.

“I really like you! But I am an outsider. I can’t stop being lonely.”

“….”

What kind of logic is that…?

At first he was going to kill me for a great cause, now it’s to stay an outsider.

[A certain god is looking for his missing belly button.]

*TN: “laughing one’s belly button off” is a Korean idiom for laughing very hard.

“This isn’t a laughing matter…”

“Today’s a merry day! I finally found a sympathizer who understands my sublime intentions! My dear comrade, Kang Hansoo! Watch over me from the other side!”

“Oh, okay.”

Everything turned into a mess as soon as the chief declared he was an outsider as well.

I don’t know anymore.

“Hm.. I’ll go with this fellow who’s been unsatisfactory lately.”

A scrawny male fairy was chosen.

“^%$# ^%$#, ^%$#…!”

“I can’t do that. Your female has to live to give me more pleasure.”

“^%$#! ^%$# ^%$#! ^%$# ^%$#^%$#?!”

“Hahaha! That’s right! Swear at me more! It’s no different than praise to me!”

“^%$#^%$# ^%$#! ^%$#^%$#~!”

The fairies stared at the chosen fairy with envy.

Death. 

The desire of all the fairies trapped in this hell filled with the smell of blood.

The ruler of this hell announced,

“Let’s begin.”

The chief laid the fairy down on the magic circle I was just on and started to piously recite his spell.

It was a prayer.

“Mother of life! Master of fate! Grant me the rest of this fairy’s days!”

Whirrr-

The magic circle drawn in dark red blood started to glow faintly.

“Interesting.” 

If prayer alone could cause such a phenomenon, countless religious people on Earth would have entered the world as mages.

Then did those geometric patterns on the magic circle have some special meaning?

While I was caught up in a thought not fit for this urgent crisis, the chief demanded of the fairy,

“Declare that you will give your lifespan to me.”

“….”

“If you do, I promise I will send your female to your side immediately. You’ve seen what happens if you refuse my mercy, right?”

“…^%$# ^%$#”

“The contract has been concluded.”

Poof!

Lights exploded from the magic circle.

What was left was the corpse of a fairy, dried out like a mummy.

The end of someone who had their lifespan stolen.

What about the chief who threatened the male fairy to steal his lifespan? Would he be that much younger?

“…A failure?”

He hadn’t changed one bit.

He was still a human male in his thirties.

He replied as he dragged the fairy out of the magic circle.

“Dear comrade Kang Hansoo. My black magic was a success.”

“But you’re not any younger?

“Hahaha! That’s because I’m not human.”

“Aha!”

I knew he wasn’t human from the beginning. I just didn’t know what species he was.

The chief pompously confessed as if he was letting me in on a tremendous secret.

“I didn’t use the fairy as a sacrifice to extend my lifespan!”

“Then what was it for?”

“Do you know how many fairies’ and travelers’ lifespans I stole while living in this village? The fairy curse is just ridiculous!”

“That’s amazing.”

This wasn’t adulation, I meant it. 

Although his methods were unforgivable, the way he didn’t surrender to the curse and found a solution was deserving of a compliment.

“Haha! I felt like you would say that!”

“….”

“When I used to be human, I became old and sick as soon as I got the fairy curse. It was a dead end for me until a wandering mage who was staying in the village offered me an experiment.”

Rip-!

The chief suddenly tore open the top he was wearing with both hands.

It looked cool, but I opened my eyes wide thinking about the waste of a good shirt.

“A gnoll…?”

On the center of his bare chest, there was the face of a hyena-like gnoll engraved on his flesh.

“I am a gnoll.”

“Huh?”

I wouldn’t be taken aback by most things thanks to the blessing, but it was impossible to not be shocked this time.

What in the world was this hybrid?

The chief cried out as he exposed his chest to me.

“Isn’t it truly amazing?! The combination of the two species with the rancor of the fairies! With the intelligence of a human and the body of a gnoll, my revenge is not far off!”

“All by yourself?”

Wouldn’t two be better than one?

“It’s enough! My black magic is the strongest after taking in countless lifespans of fairies! I’m hunting the fairies with the power of fairies! Don’t you think that’s the best revenge?!”

“But I’m not a fairy?”

“Let’s not sweat the small stuff.”

“….”

The chief smiled as he put his bloody hand on my shoulder.

“Thank you so much, comrade Kang Hansoo.”

“For what?”

“I mean this. Thanks to you teaching me what an outsider is, I could find out my identity. I am the true outsider. The lone gnoll dashing through the wild…”

“That’s…”

Outsider isn’t a species?

“I’ll never be able to forget you for listening to me until the end. As a thank you, I will use your life wisely.”

“And you’re still killing me?”

“Of course. Since I’m an outsider.”

“…..”

I learned that a serious outsider is truly dangerous.

***

There was a childish fight among the heroes over being Princess Ethena’s pupil, but the situation was quickly settled as excellent mages appeared to greet her as teachers.

A hero’s master!

There were as many mages in the continent of Fantasia who wanted such an honorable title as there were grains of sand.

As a result, class continued with all of the heroes being given a ‘magic blessing’.

“Magic is crystallized hopes and dreams. So it will fail if you can’t envision it in your head! Focus and willpower is extremely importan-”

“Princess!”

“Yes?”

“How do I apply a mathematical formula to it?”

A certain hero who got a surge of determination thanks to the blessing asked the question.

Princess Ethena, tilting her head, asked in return,

“A mathematical formula to magic?”

“Yes.” 

“Are you talking about the field primarily merchants study?”

“Yes.” 

The hero who asked grinned in satisfaction.

As he predicted, magic in the fantasy world was lagging.

Its principles were far too ancient!

Princess Ethena thought intently and answered with a solution of her own.

“Urm… in magic, two is stronger than one. But the efficiency of it drops significantly.”

“I asked about the math formula needed for the revelation of magic. I wanted to apply calculus to simplify—”

“There’s no such thing.”

“What?”

The hero who acted smart had a dumb expression on his face.

“Anyone can use magic if they have the talent. You make it more powerful through hopes and dreams, and more efficient through repetition and experience.”

“You don’t need a math equation?!”

“Did you use addition or subtraction while creating that flame?”

“Th-this is just simple magic…”

“It’s thanks to you having an outstanding master who is outstanding at making flames.”

“….”

“There is no such thing as difficult magic in this world. Only magic you aren’t used to.”

“I can’t believe it…”

The heroes had had high hopes that they could ‘simply’ become wizards in the fantasy world and were frustrated.

It was then that one of the mages who took in the heroes as an apprentice got involved.

“Princess Ethena. There is something you didn’t explain correctly to the heroes.”

“Me?”

“Yes. Math formulae can be applied to magic.”

“Wow!”

“Wow!”

With a single word from the mage, the heroes’ hopes were rekindled.

On the other hand, Princess Ethena was flustered and blushing.

“Please teach us.”

“Hahaha! I’ll keep using your flame example to explain. The angle is very important when trying to shoot the flame at a long distance. The direction and force of the wind must also be taken into consideration.”

“Ah!” 

“Also, it is necessary in war to know how to control the force of your magic according to the numbers and skills of your enemies in order to avoid unnecessary waste of mental energy.”

“War…”

“It is likely the princess may not have known because she only learned about the theories of magic in the palace, but we have been applying mathematics to make magic more efficient. That is what this clever hero was asking. Isn’t that right?”

“Y-yes!” 

Although he was completely wrong, the hero didn’t have the guts to embarrass his master like that.

[A certain god of wind considers math disgraceful.]

[A certain god changes the direction of the wind.]

[A certain immature god of dice snickers as they grab their missing belly button.]

[A certain water god is rooting for someone who is downspirited.]

[A certain god…]

“Princess Ethena. Will you allow this old man to assist your lesson? Practical magic in the battlefield will be useful to study for you as well.”

“Yes, please..”

Princess Ethena, realizing her mistake, stepped back with a gloomy expression.

On the other side, the masters of the heroes had wide grins on their faces.

“Practical magic is…”

“Superior magic is…”

“In practice, …”

The heroes improved with immense speed with the great masters’ guidance!

[A certain god of law contentedly watches over the future scholars.]

[A certain impatient demon god peeks at some underwear.]

[A certain god of law gets angry and goes after them.]

Crack! Bang! Zap…!

It looks like the entire continent of Fantasia will be full of thunder, lightning, and storms today.

***

Finally, the moment of fate!

Whir-

I was on top of the bloody magic circle that was no different than the gallows.

The chief, having recited the spells of the magic circle, repeated the same demands he had made of the male fairy, minus the threats.

“Declare that you will give me your lifespan.”

“It appears black magic requires the sacrifice’s consent?”

“I can physically bind the body, but that doesn’t mean I own it, you see. Now! Hurry up and declare…”

“Before that, I have a request.”

“Hm… what is it?”

The chief looked irritated, but thanks to the favorability I built up with him he didn’t go mad with rage.

“Before I die with honor, I want to see Misa one more time.”

“Misa? Do you mean the mercenary who carries around a giant crossbow?

“Yes. You know who I mean.”

“How come you’re looking for that girl?”

“She’s my lover.”

“Nonsense! I am the chief. I know everything that happens here. Did you think I wouldn’t know that Misa’s lover is Cole? Don’t use my goodwill to play foolish games.”

I was a little impressed.

I thought he was out of his mind, but he really was doing his job as the chief well!

But that made things easier.

“Cole is her ex-boyfriend. It changed recently.”

“…Is it you now?”

“Yes.”

“Your proof?”

“Smell me. Since you are a gnoll with an advanced sense of smell, you will know right away.”

The chief sniffed with the face of the gnoll on his chest.

“…There’s no doubt about it. This is what I remember Misa’s body odor was. There’s no way your entire body would smell like her if she wasn’t your lover.”

“Of course.”

Of course there’s no way, I’m wearing her clothes.

Embarrassed, the chief cleared his throat.

“Ahem! I’m sincerely sorry for doubting you.”

“Then can I see Misa…”

“Sorry about that, too. If Misa goes missing, Gary and Cole will grow suspicious. Things would get too complicated.”

“Alright…”

The chief would kill Misa just for meeting me.

Amazing, really.

“Wish for something else instead. I’ll try to grant almost anything.”

A wish!

I had been waiting for him to say this.

Mentioning Misa, who should be the turd of a gnoll by now, and appealing emotionally was all for this moment.

I wish for…

“If I survive this, please let me go free until I meet Misa.”

“A life that’s lost its lifespan doesn’t survive.”

“Still. It’s because I can’t think of anything else.”

“Hm… I promise.”

“Then I swear.”

“The contract has been concluded!”

Beam-!

An even brighter light than when the male fairy was sacrificed shot out of the magic circle.

And immediately after,

“Aaagh?!”

Pain that went well past my expectations surged through me.

Bastard chief! You said it wouldn’t hurt!

It hurt so much, I wanted to die.

“Farewell. I’ll tell Misa you’ve gone somewhere far away.”

“…That’s going to be difficult. Misa went somewhere far away first, you see.”

“What the- kirk?!”

Pow-!

With full force, my fist struck the defenseless chief’s face.