Marriage B - Chapter 18
Chapter 18 – A Long Nightmare
At first, when Terio confessed his love, all Goyo felt was betrayal so great it felt as if the world had collapsed under her. She couldn’t believe that Terio, her only friend who she had thought would eternally be her friend, was looking at her with different eyes. It was hard for her to accept the change from a perfectly stable relationship as friends to an unstable relationship as lovers.
But in the end, Goyo Rubiet lost the fight against her heart. Even her mind could no longer see him as her eternal friend, who would stand by her side. She began thinking of Terio as a potential lover. And even if Terio’s declaration of eternal friendship had collapsed, his proposition that we became lovers was beyond reproach.
Besides, wouldn’t this be okay as well? After all, though this sweet excitement won’t last forever, if she married Terio and had children, she would still be able to have a harmonious family that she had been dreaming of.
And in her young mind, perhaps Terio could love her forever.
After all, he had vowed so. It was a vow of love from the mouth of a man who fell in love with her and who she loved in turn. How could she not believe it? And though he had betrayed her once, it was because his affections for her were greater than his friendship with her. And not for any other reasons.
Content with her conclusion, Goyo closed her eyes while still being held in Terio’s arms. At that moment, her mother’s words, which she had kept close in her heart, flowed through her head.
“Goyo, you should marry someone you love. A political marriage wouldn’t bring anyone happiness… To have a child with someone you didn’t love… can only be considered a tragedy rather than happiness. That’s when the hells begins.”
“Mother, why do you say that…?”
“Goyo, you must be happy. Even if I was unhappy with my life, you should do your best to strive for happiness.”
You’re right, Mother. If I had married someone I didn’t love or had a political marriage with someone, I would never have known this happiness.
And because they were Alte and Rubiet, they never faced any opposition from their parents. So, Goyo was able to receive love she yearned for.
Thus, Goyo believed that her ending would be different from her mother, who died miserably. At this moment, Goyo believed that her life would be full of happiness. She felt incredibly happy, so much so that she was unable to restrain her joy, making it spill over from her mouth.
“I love you, too, Terio. If your love is eternal, my love will be the same.”
I love you.
You killed Melissa.
I love you.
If you hadn’t refused to marry him… if you had just let me go… Melissa would be alive now.
I love you.
That woman, who didn’t share a drop of Rubiet’s blood, would be hale and hearty in my arms now.
“Terio?”
The one who hugged Goyo pushed her away. He then threw Goyo to the floor and said with an incredibly cold voice.
It’s not you that I love.
In an instant, the dream collapsed and the long nightmare was over.
Goyo opened her eyes in a hurry and took in a deep rough breath, heart still racing. It was beating so violently that she wouldn’t be surprised if her heart suddenly popped out.
She feebly raised herself up from bed and leaned against the bedhead. Her whole body damped with cold sweat as flashes of the nightmare or rather her past came to the forefront of her mind.
Damn you, Terio Alte.
She was so incensed that a rough word she had never ever used in her life popped out in her mind. But in no time, she willed herself to calm down and tightly closed her eyes shut, flipping the bangs that got stuck on her forehead due to the cold sweat.
It had been a long time since she dreamed of the past.
At that time, the room opened and Annie, Goyo’s maid, came in. Noticing that her lady was up, Annie gave her morning greetings like she usually did before she realized that something was off with Goyo.
“Miss, are you up? No, wait a second. Miss, what’s wrong with your face?”
“Annie.”
“Oh my God, look at your sweat! Did you have a nightmare?”
“I just had a rather unpleasant dream.”
It was not uncommon for Goyo to have nightmares. So, Annie was not surprised. She merely looked sorry for her. Fortunately, she quickly covered up her emotion and nodded her head while handing over the cup of water that was placed on the tray to her.
As she felt the sensation of the cold water passing through her throat, Goyo seemed to come back to her senses.
“It’s past nine?”
“No, miss. It’s still 8:30”
“If that’s the case, then why did you come so early? I told you to wake me up at nine the next day after the ball.”
“Miss, it was because… I need to tell you something urgently.”
“What is it?” Goyo asked while handing over the cup. After a little hesitation, Annie opened her mouth.
“A proposal for marriage had come from Marquis Bethelgius.”
Goyo momentarily paused at that news as she blinked in slight surprise.
She was wondering silently whether Annie had already known that the marquis and she were dancing together at yesterday’s ball or not. However, at this time, Annie carefully asked her about the matter, as if she had been ordered by the duke to get the answer before going. Unfortunately, it did not reach Goyo’s ear as she had already drifted back to her mind.
Goyo still couldn’t believe how fierce her dream was, and how it still sent her heart racing even after it was over. Yet, right now, her heart was pounding with a different reason from before.
And this made Goyo helplessly laugh at herself since she had never known how agitated she could get just from her dream and that piece of news.
“You should marry someone you love. You couldn’t be happy with a political marriage.”
No, mother. Marriage with a loved one was the most painful hell for me. So, although the other path available for me is surely going to lead me to death, I will never choose that path again.
“No, I didn’t know.”
The only things she could do was to choose a less painful death.
Isn’t that right, mother?