Please Stop Pretending To Be a Cute Newcomer! - Chapter 1
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Chapter 1: Horror Game
When Shen Qingcheng opened his eyes, he found himself on a bus.
The bus was rundown and the rough road outside made it a bumpy ride. He was seated in the very back. On his left was a dusty glass window, and on his right was a blonde teenager listening to music through his headphones.
A dozen or so people were scattered across the bus, some playing with their phones, some sleeping with their heads drooping. The driver in front yawned widely, covering his mouth, then swerved abruptly.
The bus turned perfectly and the driver kept guiding it along the potholed road.
A child suddenly woke up and began to cry, its loud voice harsh and grating. Its mother patted and coaxed it to calm down, but it didnt stop crying.
Shen Qingcheng tried to open the window next to him, but was unsuccessful. The bus was just too rusty.
He looked out the window, which was so grimy and dusty that he could see very little. It was so bad that it almost felt like he had myopia. Still, in the distance, he could see a indistinct mountain and a cliff right beside the mountain road the bus was on.
The child was still crying. A man woke up besides it and scolded it twice, but no one acknowledged him, and no one apologized.
Shen Qingcheng cleared his throat and said Mister, Id like to get off.
The bus was stuffy and noisy, and he couldnt think in it. He had to get out, to find a quiet place to clear his mind and wonder how he got here.
The driver yawned again.
You have to get off at the next stop, since theres no way youll be able to hail a taxi here.
The teenager with the headphones glanced at him, and the graying grandmother in front of him turned around.
This road only has one bus each day. If you dont ride it all the way to the village, there wont be any stores nearby. What are you going to do then?
Shen Qingcheng considered it for a second, then replied Im going to the city.
The city? The grandmother frowned. This way leads into the mountains. If you want to go back to the city, itll take four or five hours the other way. Did you take the wrong bus?
Old lady, youre just yammering on and on! said the man who had scolded the child.
He was ignored again.
Shen Qingcheng answered the grandmother with a sincere expression.
Yeah, I took the wrong bus.
He didnt actually know if he had–hed just woken up here, after all.
The grandmother smiled.
Creak. The bus jolted to a stop. The driver called out sleepily from the front.
Get off quickly.
Shen Qingcheng got up neatly and stepped out of the bus, closing the door behind him. The bus was coated with more mud than had been visible from the inside, and it was thicker than expected. It was like the bus had been rolled through the mud multiple times.
He looked up to see faces in the bus window watching him, indistinct and blurred through the dusty window.
The bus started again and drove away, a dozen or so people still plastered to the windows, watching. Shen Qingcheng stretched and took a deep breath of fresh mountain air. It was much more comfortable out here than in the stuffy bus.
It would be even more comfortable if there were a SF bus to take him back to the city, and a prebooked hotel with hot water and delicious food already ready for him.
He smacked his lips together hungrily as he daydreamed, before sighing and starting to walk back. He couldnt help but consider the reason he had appeared on the bus as he began trudging down the road.
Did that stupid ghost pull him into an illusion, or what?
No way, he must be dead already
Shen Qingchengs origin was quite strange. He was a celestial master, commonly known as Yin-Yang-xiansheng, who was taught by another highly renowned old celestial master that worked for the National Security Bureau.
Twenty years ago, an old Taoist priest in Xuanqing Guan predicted the birth of a ghost that would bring about the misery and death of many human beings. Shortly after his prediction, he coughed blood and died.
The celestial master was extremely concerned by this prediction. Taoism was declining, and he had no disciples fit to be his successor. He didnt even know if he himself was strong enough to face the ghost.
Around this time, Shen Qingcheng was picked up out of an orphanage by the celestial master.
He was so naturally talented that the old celestial master pinned all his hopes on him. He insisted on passing down his entire lifes teachings before he took his last breath, and Shen Qingcheng did his best to live up to his expectations. After two decades, he really did manage to kill that ghost.
No, wait a minute.
The price of that ghosts death shouldve been his life, right?
That must mean Shen Qingcheng was dead. Where was he now, then? Shen Qingcheng touched his chin, pondering.
Suddenly, he came to a fork in the road and heard a car honking behind him. He immediately stopped considering and turned around, waving vigorously.
Brother, let me hitch a ride!
The black car that he was yelling towards stopped, and the man driving rolled down the window, cold air rushing out. He stuck his head out.
Where are you going?
Shen Qingcheng inquired, Can you drop me off in the city?
The man nodded. Get in the car.
He looked to be in his early thirties, with an ordinary face. As he drove, he began to chat.
Where are you from, little brother?
Shen Qingcheng said promptly, without blinking, Im a local. Honestly, though, he had no idea.
Im also a local. Today Im going home to visit relatives, said the man. Its pretty hard to walk this road, and there arent a lot of cars passing through, either. Why were you there, then?
Shen Qingcheng could only reply, I found out that I took the wrong bus, and I ended up having to get off halfway.
The man shook his head. Wow, you mustve been really far off to end up here.
When will we reach the town?
Theres a bus stop that well get to in half an hour, I can drop you off there.
Okay, Shen Qingcheng agreed, and grabbed his wallet from his trouser pocket.
The man wasnt pleased when he saw this. Hey, I dont want your money.
Shen Qingcheng didnt try to argue, putting the wallet back. Then, Ill trouble you.
He really had to save his money. After all, he didnt even know if he had enough money on him to stay in a hotel.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Half an hour later, the muddy dirt road had already turned into a stretch of highway. There was a bus stop on the side of the road, where the man dropped Shen Qingcheng off.
The man waved goodbye, then rolled up his window and drove away.
Such good people still existed in the world, huh Shen Qingcheng was greatly moved by the generosity of the man.
He stood at the bus stop, waiting and taking a catalog of his things.
He counted the money in his wallet. 465 RMB–just barely enough to stay in a hotel for two days. Luckily, he also had a credit card, though hed have to use an ATM to check the balance later.
Unfortunately, he didnt know the password for the card
He hurriedly opened the wallet again, relaxing only when he saw that the ID card had his correct name and photo.
Shen Qingcheng then sorted out his next actions. First was booking a hotel, then changing the password of the card.
As for figuring out why he was here? Did it matter why? He was dead, after all. There were countless possibilities.
Still, he couldnt just ignore it.
He slid his hand into his trouser pocket again, taking out a mobile phone. If he turned this phone on, it felt like there would be no turning back.
Even turning a phone on could make massive changes in ones life.
It was a pity that Shen Qingcheng had OCD. He couldnt help but turn on the phone.
There was a huge red notification badge on the screen of the phone, indicating an unread message. Could someone like him really ignore it?
Shen Qingcheng tapped on the notification.
Test copy AO3 clearance tasks in progress
Objectives: 1. Escape from Mount Mang. 2. Eliminate the specter. Complete either objective to clear the level. The time limit is seven days. Those who exceed the time limit will be punished for failure.
Welcome to the horror world. Happy gaming!
Shen Qingcheng was baffled.
What the hell? What was a clearance task? Where was Mount Mang? What was the horror world?
Who am I? Where am I?
A swaying bus interrupted his thoughts by stopping right in front of him. He got in and took out two RMB to pay the fare, then sat down to inspect the phone more closely.
The contents of the phone had changed at some point.
The clearance tasks have been completed and the player has completed the objective: Escape from Mount Mang. The player now possesses a certain degree of survivability.
Task completion time: 1 hour and 52 minutes. This clearance time is currently ranked first among all test copies.
The reward will be settled after the player leaves the copy. Please select whether the player would like to leave the copy immediately.
Yes/No.
Shen Qingcheng was stunned. He had found the objective by accident, and had completed it by accident as well. Wasnt this a bit too simple?
Well, at least now he knew the mountain he just came down from was called Mount Mang.
His eyes lingered on the phone text for a second, and eventually he clicked No.
The player chose to stay in the copy. Countdown: 6 days, 22 hours.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shen Qingcheng really did end up spending six days in the copy. He changed his credit card password, upgraded himself to the best hotel possible, and had fun. He ate and drank to his hearts content, living a life akin to a salted fish.
Even if he was a salted fish, he was definitely a celestial salted fish, okay?
Shen Qingcheng almost wanted to cry. The 20 years he lived before were simply inhumane compared to this new life.
If he could, he would love to proclaim loudly to this salted fish lifestyle that he truly loved it. If only he could extend the deadline to 10,000 years, and not a single week
When the countdown was about to end, Shen Qingcheng returned to the hotel with his bags, finished eating all his snacks and sweets, then climbed into bed.
He glanced one last time at his snacks, and sighed contentedly.
Perfect.
After tucking the quilt around himself, Shen Qingcheng closed his eyes peacefully.
3, 2, 1.
The countdown is over and the player is leaving the copy.
The clearance data is suspicious. The player is suspected of using an external plug-in. Investigation is under way.
What?
The words resounded directly in his mind this time, shocking Shen Qingcheng greatly.
Youre the one who said I passed the test, and now youre accusing me of cheating? How could you do this to me?
His body seemed to blur, before he was gone, leaving behind a bed full of snack wrappers and a human-shaped depression in the middle.
At the same time, a slight pop! suddenly sounded in the room, and the TV on the wall flashed and turned on by itself. The screen was playing the hot news from the past few days.
On July 15th, there was heavy rain on Mount Mang. A black car hit a cliff and crashed due to the heavy rain blocking the view of the driver, who died on impact.
On July 16th, the weather cleared up. A bus on Mount Mang Road crashed into a cliff due to the driver driving while fatigued. There were 17 passengers in the bus, as well as the driver. None of them survived.
Heavy rain made the mountain roads muddy. After the bus incident, there were five consecutive traffic accidents on Mount Mang Road, resulting in 6 deaths and 3 injuries. Life is valuable; please drive cautiously and take care of yourselves.
In the cabinet beneath the TV were stacked piles of magazines and newspapers that Shen Qingcheng bought to relieve his boredom. The top newspapers front page is covering the same event as the news.
Shen Qingcheng came into the copy on July 17th.
Mom, mom, gege is asleep! Can we watch TV now? A little girls voice and laughter echoed through the empty living room.
Shh. Dont wake up your gege, or hell spank you again.
The air wavered for a second. Suddenly, a little girl in a lacy pink dress was standing there, covering her mouth in panic.
TLN:
A celestial master () is a Taoist master.
Xiansheng () is a Chinese honorific that basically means Mr. or Sir.
Xiongdi () literally means Brother, but can basically be used by males to refer to any older man. If a man addresses another man they dont know as brother, you can pretty much assume he used Xiongdi.
Salted fish () means corpse, but is also used for a lazy person or someone who doesnt want to do anything.
Gege () literally means older brother, but is used to address slightly older men affectionately. They do not actually have to be blood-related. This will remain in pinyin to hopefully mitigate confusion, since in English brother is pretty much only used for actual siblings.