Salvation Equation - Chapter 8

Chapter 8. The Count’s Sickness

***

The past continued.

 

Madeline looked down at Cory, and reflected on her memory.

 

When Cory was found…

 

The dog’s fur was a little damp, but there was not a speck of mud on it. When Madeline called a servant to inquire about the details, the story returned that Charles, a footman, took a risk and found the dog during the stormy night.

 

Why would Charles do that? Perhaps the Count had given him an order? But the Count wouldn’t go that far for a dog.

 

But Madeline had no choice but to believe the story. She called Charles personally to thank him. 

 

Of course, she was going to give him a reward. But when Madeline handed him the envelope, Charles was very uncomfortable.

 

“Ma’am, I just did what I had to do.”

 

“But…I feel bad that I put you in danger unnecessarily and….” 

 

Madeline blushed. She was aware of how childishly she had behaved. 

 

“No, I’m fine. I really don’t mind.”

 

“No, please accept it. Charles. It’s how I feel.”

 

“Oh, I’ll be in trouble if you do this.”

 

Charles was at a loss. After arguing for a while, Charles eventually lost. Madeline also saw the act of giving money in this way as a tip.

 

And shortly after, the Count was sick. Madeline decided to go up to the upper study to see the Count in person. It was not that she had anything to say to him about this. But he was her husband, and they would meet only if they had something in particular to say to each other as a couple. 

 

‘I think it would be better to confirm a lot of things directly.’

 

There was also the idea of seeking a reconciliation – or rather a truce – in its own way. Because it was true that communication between her husband and herself was not going well. She would not be able to live like a ghost for the rest of her life.

 

At that moment, as she headed for the Count’s study, Sebastian, the chief butler, stopped her. Unlike his usual vague impression, he prevented Madeline with a stubborn face. His face turned red and blue as if he was angry with her.

 

“How can I help you, madam?”

 

“As a wife, I don’t think I need another reason to go to see my husband.”

 

Madeline was puzzled and spoke to him brusquely. As she looked at him sharply, he coughed a few times.

 

Madelaine gave him a hard look between the eyes, and Sebastian hmmmed and ahhed. He coughed a few times. 

 

“The Count…..he wants to be alone.”

 

“I understand. Then why don’t you tell him I’d like to see him?”

 

“….” 

 

Sebastian shivered unexpectedly, freaked out. He looked from side to side and said again. 

 

“Master Nottingham is having a hard time to receive guests today. If it is urgent, I can deliver your message….”

 

“I am not a guest.”

 

“…….” 

 

Sebastian’s face turned red. He was aware that he had made a slip of his tongue. He began to stammer.

 

“The Count….”

 

“I know. He doesn’t even like being in the same place as me.”

 

“No! It’s never like that…”

 

Sebastian looked completely trapped. He sighed. 

 

“Unfortunately, the Count is not feeling well at the moment….”

 

“His illness makes me want to see him even more.” 

 

Madeline’s voice rose. Of course, Ian Nottingham had a hard time moving due to injury. Nevertheless, it was hard to imagine him lying there sick.

 

Of course, he was in a weakened state due to the aftereffects of the injury. 

 

‘’What’s wrong…”

 

“He’s been feeling a little tired lately.”

 

Sebastian was back to his usual expressionless butler. He begged Madeline in a pleading manner. 

 

“Please don’t disturb the Count. He has to be absolutely stable…”

 

“…… is there anything I can do?”

 

“…… The Count said he didn’t want anyone to visit, especially the madam.”

 

‘You don’t particularly want to see me?’

 

Madeline shook her head. Yes. This time she lost it again. 

 

“If he was sick, it wouldn’t matter if he didn’t want to see me. That’s too bad. I thought we could have a cup of tea together.”

 

She said it lightly, but frankly she was worried. She wondered if his already injured and weakened body could survive a cold. 

 

“Have you called a doctor?”

 

“Yes, ma’am. We have taken the necessary steps, don’t worry. The doctor has recommended absolute bed rest.”

 

“…….” 

 

Madeline flinched a little at Sebastian’s defensive attitude, which did not allow for even a moment’s pause. As expected, he was the Count’s servant.

 

“…If anything happens, be sure to let me know.”

 

With those words the only thing left to say, Madeline had no choice but to turn around. 

 

But.

 

* * *

 

It was night. A pitch-dark night. A night where even the shadows kill their breath. The night at Nottingham Mansion was even darker than in other places. It was like a cave that sucked in all the light in the world. Madeline kept tossing and turning. 

 

Why was that? Her whole body felt sluggish and heavy. Her neck was stiff and sore. 

 

“Do I have a cold too?”

 

She sat up. Excruciating thirst, suffocation. A heaviness that seemed to press down on her chest and all over her body. She didn’t know where that smoldering feeling originated. No, actually, she did know. 

 

[Go home.]

 

This was what the man said to her. She couldn’t stand to think of the silent emotions contained in that tired, gaunt face. Why did he look at her like that?

 

“Don’t talk like you’re worried about me. I hate you ! I hate you!”

 

Madeline had tried many times to escape from this mansion, but each time she was caught by him. The man always looked for her. It was as if he had a magic crystal ball. 

 

She still got chills when she remembered the servant waiting for her at the London station. 

 

In the end, it was always Madeline who returned to the mansion on her own. There was never any coercion or intimidation of any kind. There was only a silent pressure.

 

Gradually, the house became a huge prison. The mansion was a single room, and the Count was a fellow inmate and watchman. Everything was because of Ian. No, it had to be.

 

Madeline got out of bed. She was dressed in a wool gown over a thin slip. Outside the room, it was dark except for a few dim lights in the hallway. 

 

There were still traces of the storm that had passed. There was the sound of violent winds crashing against the windows. Whoosh, whoosh, the sound of the wind was intense. 

 

Its sound, like a human wailing, was so desolate that Madeline shivered. 

 

Madeline’s steps stopped at the stairs. She didn’t know why she was worried in the first place. Her footsteps unexpectedly took her to the third floor of the “forbidden place”. 

 

She climbed up the stairs with her small lamp. Closer and closer to the man’s bedroom. Each step was heavy. Perhaps she wanted to make sure. Maybe she wanted to find comfort in seeing the man sick.

 

What comfort? The comfort that since humans all die, he should die too and she could be set free?

 

Or she wanted to see if he’s alive? She was confused. Madeline did not know what she wanted to see. 

 

She stopped in front of a heavy wooden door.

 

“Argggg!”

 

After standing still for a while, as soon as Madeline heard the screams coming from inside the room, she opened the door and quickly went inside.

 

“What is it…?”

 

On the bed, the Count was crying, holding his head in his hands. 

 

“Isabel…Isabel…Forgive me…”

 

It wasn’t weeping, it was closer to the wailing of a beast. The man in a fever was mumbling something incomprehensible. Madeline put her lamp on the small table and quickly went to the side of the bed. 

 

Was it a dangerous situation? 

 

The man lying on the bed was pale. His otherwise pale face was much whiter from cold sweat. His black hair was wet with sweat and stuck to his forehead. 

 

The scars were fuller distorted, and there was a dark shade of purple under his eyes. It was a dual appearance, a manly face but at the same time looking sickly and weak. 

 

Odd beauty. Madeline trembled with fear at the sight of this graceful figure, strangely twisted like a torch. The man kept moaning, as if he didn’t know she had come near him. 

 

Madeline reached out her hand. She gently placed her palm on the man’s pale forehead. 

 

“It’s hot.” 

 

It was as hot as if her hand had touched a warmed teapot. What should she do? She had never nursed anyone with a high fever, so Madeline didn’t know what to do. 

 

She decided to bring him a cold hand towel. When she turned away and went to get a wet towel, a skinny, shaky hand caught her hand.

 

It was the strength of an anglerfish, so strong that one wondered how a sick person could have such strength. Madeline moaned. 

 

“Oh, ugh…it hurts…”

 

“…Isabel….?”

 

She turned around and saw the man looking at her with narrowed eyes. 

 

Isabel. Ian’s sister’s name. He mistook Madeline for his sister. Madeline’s body stiffened. She didn’t know how he would react if he knew that she had come here without permission. But instead of being horrified, she was perplexed.

 

“……” 

 

She couldn’t find the right words to describe it, just her lips trembled thinly.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

 

Ian’s low-pitched voice was distorted with pain as he repeatedly said sorry.

 

Like a mirage that disappeared if he released it, the strength holding Madeline’s hand kept growing.

 

“I should have left you…alone to live…. It’s me…my greed….”

 

She felt like her wrist was about to break. Shivering, Madeline covered the man’s hand with her other hand. 

 

“Calm down. I am not Isabel, I am your wife.”

 

Madeline…Nottingham. Madeline didn’t care what happened, she just wanted to calm the man in front of her.

 

“Madeline…”

 

“Yes. It’s your…”

 

“My wife.”

 

The man smiled faintly. At the same time, the power was removed from his hand. The disappointment and pain disappeared from his face, and instantly peace came. 

 

‘……’

 

“Don’t leave me.”

 

The man murmured in a small voice. 

 

“Just like that time.”

 

“…….”

 

Madeline couldn’t speak. It must have been that time when she dared to run away from home.

 

When she turned her head, she could see the Mansfield roses she was growing by the window.

 

“…….”

 

Just like that time. Madeline closed her eyes tightly.