To You Who Never Loved Me - Chapter 9

Chapter 9

 

The conversation ended like that, but I, in Becky’s arms, couldn’t stop

flinching for a while. At first, I was scared, but after thinking about it, I

hated the elderly who dared to say such a thing.

If you hadn’t told me to leave, I wouldn’t have panicked!

“Hyung! Can I go with you?”

“You have family members.”

“Then, when I grow up later, can you accept me as a colleague?”

“If you listen carefully to your parents and grow up to be a great adult!.”

I buried my face in Becky’s stomach, turning my head at the sound of a

friendly conversation between Michael and another kid.

I didn’t know until now. Michael is kind to anyone, even if it’s not me.

Even if it wasn’t me who was on the Rocky Island, Michael would have

saved them.

If there is a child who has no parents in the village other than me, maybe

my place now belongs to that child.

Even if it wasn’t me, Michael…

“Michael! Can’t we ride horses together?”

Out of Becky’s arms, I ran toward Michael.

When he grabbed my arm and showed a nagging attitude for the first time,

Michael happily took me on the saddle.

“Rose! Until before, you were sticking to my arms and standing behind

me!”

Becky was disappointed, but this was an unavoidable choice. I felt relieved

only when I was stuck with Michael.

After I left the village, I felt relieved to a certain extent. The thought that he

would never leave me relieved me a bit.

“Rose, are you sore?”

“Oh no!”

“Feeling nauseous?.”

Michael was ahead of the others. Also, Michael’s voice was low, so our

conversation might not be heard by the party behind.

“Can you please relax?”

When he stroked my hair, I hear the words that seemed soothing, but

instead of soothing, I felt my heart grow heavier. I wasn’t worried about

Michael, but I was really worried about whether my existence would be

helpful.

“…Michael.”

“Yes, Rose.”

“…”

“It’s okay, tell me anything.”

“…On that day, even if it wasn’t me who was sacrificed, would you have

saved that person?”

“Sure.”

It was an answer without hesitation. At the same time, I was relieved and

disappointed. Contrary to Seed’s words, I was relieved because it was a

Michael-like answer I knew, but I was disappointed when I thought it

wouldn’t matter if it wasn’t me. It was contradictory, but I couldn’t help

myself feeling this way.

“If he doesn’t have parents too, would he have brought him like me now?”

“…Well.”

“Actually, you were hoping I would choose to stay in that town earlier,

right?”

“….”

I couldn’t handle the sorrow in my heart and poured it out. I regretted it

right after I spit it out.

Am I too far? Am I cheeky? What if Michael gets upset…?

“Rose.”

However, the voice that followed was warmer and softer than I expected.

“Actually, I was relieved, because you didn’t leave me.”

“…”

“And because you like me that much.”

The warm voice seemed to touch Rose’s ears. The facial muscles were

hardened, so the facial expression management was not easy. I was sitting

in front of Michael, so I was so glad he couldn’t see my face. Seemed like

my whole body would ring, I heard a strong sound from inside. Only after a

while did I know it was the ringing of my heart.

This was my first time.

It would be natural for a person who was saved by a hero to like that hero.

I liked Michael, and I wanted to be as helpful as possible.

But now, for the first time, I have questioned my feelings.

Can I say that this only comes from the desire to return the favor?

I don’t want to fall in love, but even if he’s a little nice, I can’t control

myself…

Is it really just a feeling of affection for you because you saved my life?

“Michael…do you like me to stay with you?”

“Of course.”

The courageous question was answered with the price.

“I really need you.”

It would have been nice if he only told me that far.

“And if it’s not me, who’s going to save you.”

“…”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong. Because I care about you.”

Michael’s words that followed were true and could not be refuted, and my

heart was heavy because they were realistic.

“You were abandoned and sacrifice to a monster in your old village.”

“…”

“There’s no guarantee that town will not do that later.”

“…”

“It’s a tough world for a child with no family or strength to live in.”

I felt a lightweight on the top of my head. Michael had his chin on my head.

“And I’m worried about your ability.”

“Michael, do you want me to hide my abilities?”

“It’s your freedom to show your strength. But people will try to take

advantage of you.”

It was similar to what my father told me. I couldn’t say that my father

didn’t use me either, but…….

“Michael, aren’t you going to use me?”

I could hear low laughter from above my head for some reason.

“I’m the one who saved your life. Don’t you trust me?”

“Oh, no, no! Of course, I do, I trust Michael the most in the world!”

Michael, who pressed the blood vessels clearly on his wrist because he

had fair skin, continued.

Michael’s hand, without a brief answer, gently grasped my wrist. Michael

squeezed the veins that were visible in my wrists because of my white skin.

“Then you can count on me from now on.”

It wasn’t that there was an echo, but I felt the illusion of repeating those

words in my ears.

Then you just have to trust me in the future.

You just have to trust me in the future.

All you have to do is trust me.

Only Michael, you just have to believe.

“Why are you so nice to me?”

“It is natural to help someone weak or lacking.”

“Are you helping me because I’m weak or lacking?”

“You can’t do anything without me.”

He didn’t mean to belittle or blame me. So there was nothing more to say.

Can I get something to eat alone without Michael?

No.

Settling in town without Michael?

It was hard to believe in strangers anymore.

But what about finding a place to stay without Michael?

It was also something I couldn’t do alone.

“It’s okay, Rose, it’s not wrong to be lacking.”

Seemed like he read my heart, Michael comforted me.

“Because I only need to fill it up as much as you lack.”

“Yeah…”

“So, shouldn’t you be a good child who listens well?”

Again, I nodded gently, Michael stroked my head with praise.

“There is another dog that listens well.”

At that time, someone who was disturbing our time appeared.

“To me, Rose is more like a kitten than a dog.”

“Don’t treat people as beasts.”

Even if Sid pretended to be driving a horse close to us, he looked full of

complaints. He looks good, so why are there so many complaints?

“…Seed treated me like a dog first.”

Seed’s eyes sharpened at the word that was said timidly. When a

disturbance appeared in the quarrel with Michael, he seemed to be

displeased.

Seed hates Michael, so he’ll see all of Michael’s actions badly. And that

person doesn’t seem to like me either.

I don’t know the details of their relationship, but at least I didn’t want

Michael to be attacked by him.

Seed’s eyes looking down at me conveyed to me the feelings of

displeasure, but I didn’t avoid his eyes until the end.

“Hey, Seed, are you fighting a little girl?”

If it wasn’t for Pavice or Becky approaching, I would have opened my eyes

and continued the cold fight with Seed until I was in tears.

Seed turned his head with a terrifying expression when Pavice approached.

“There’s no time to fight because there’s a long way to go to the temple of

that mad goddess.”

“Bec, Becky! Cra, crazy… Poetry, blasphemy!”

“Huh? Blasphemy?”

When I heard Becky’s remarks, my heart was pounding, and Becky looked

like she didn’t know what the problem was. I have heard many stories of

people who have been cursed by God since childhood. I didn’t want Becky

to turn into a beast or become a monster like them. But Becky’s face

turned mischievous without knowing how I felt.

“Crazy goddesses are called crazy goddesses, then what we call a crazy

goddess?”

“Ha, don’t do it!”

Becky’s giggling laughter rang in the forest. I was worried that the goddess

might hear it, but this moment was not bad.

This was the happiest moment in my life when Michael patted my head

from occasionally, Becky teased me, was interested, loved, and belonged

somewhere.

* * *

We left early in the morning and wasted all that day moving on. When I

lifted my head, I could face the sunlight seeping through the fresh leaves.

Perhaps because it was a forest directly connected to the village, the road

was easy to go because there was a separate road.

I had a pain in my buttocks because of the long ride, unlike Michael and

Fabice, who notice and worry about it, Becky made me sad by saying that

it’s okay to get used to it.

Fortunately, this uncomfortable moment comes to an end.

A valley was seen at the end of the forest, and Michael declared camp

here.

On the other side of the forest, we escaped from was another forest, with

a valley in between.

“That’s the Dream Forest.”

Michael lowered me from the horse and explained to me.

“There are rumors that it is a forest controlled by the Moon Goddess.”

The rumor was circulating because it was a forest right near the temple

where the goddess of the moon was enshrined and no one escaped safely.

But still, as a goddess, I don’t think they’ll let us out of the forest for no

reason… I wondered if they had been rude in the goddess’s forest.

Anyway, looking at the forest, I could see why the villagers were worried.

Unlike the forest we’ve just escaped, the Dream Forest was seemingly

ordinary, but somehow it gave off a prickly feeling.