Your Majesty, Please Don’t Kill Me Again - Chapter 19

Chapter 19

“I already told you, since I was a child, my father spoke of you in high regard, and that prompted me to work under you.”

“Do you think I’ll believe that the Count was talking about me like that?”

“If you don’t believe it, then I can’t do anything about it… but that doesn’t change the fact that I will follow you.”

“So why?”

The conversation returned to where it started. I sighed and stood up because I felt like I was talking to a wall and was going nowhere. Surprised by my sudden movement, the raccoon hissed with its fur standing up. Rupert petted the animal and calmed it down as if he knew it well.

I was really surprised by how friendly he was. An Emperor who’s interested in raccoons.

I was confused whenever I saw Rupert’s aspect that I didn’t know about or couldn’t even imagine.

The way he teases me because he thinks he can play the piano well, the way he takes care of a raccoon as a pet, the way he takes care of Tori, and the way he throws thorny words at me to scare me.

He’s still a child, so it makes sense for him to act like a child.

However, that part is now blurring into something that couldn’t be real. Rupert has never been an average child, but once in a while, he seemed normal. Especially when he feels at ease whenever he’s around Tori.

I hate those moments.

I didn’t like it at all.

I hate that I found their interactions even remotely cute.

The Emperor should look and act like a ruthless monster all the time, even as a newborn child.

I don’t want to look at that monster and see a person within.

Putting aside the fact that I hate him very much, he’s just a child with a nasty temper with no regard for others. He’s arrogant, but that’s a given since he’s a Vellnelum, part of the Imperial Family. He’s sensitive because he always needs to look out for himself.

But this… this terrifies me.

I trembled at the gap between the Rupert I know now and the Emperor I remember. He doesn’t look like the Emperor I remember at all. He massacred the nobles in an inhuman purge when he was only eighteen. He’s fourteen now.

What pushed this brat to the edge of the cliff to madness to become such a murderer?

Why did he kill Tori, who was always sticking next to him?

With all of these thoughts starting to accumulate, I’m beginning to hate myself because I always find myself somehow defending this monster. I keep thinking that if he was born a monster, my guilt wouldn’t be as grave compared to when I blamed an innocent child who went mad because of his own circumstances.

But I need to be strong.

Whether he’s a monster by nature or a monster created by tragic circumstances, my deep-rooted fear and hatred for him will not disappear.

I need to hate him with a searing passion.

I want to lie in bed comfortably, thinking I’m justified in my hatred. I want to let my selfishness win and be the victim.

While trying to avoid his stern gaze, I answered.

“I want to be of help to Your Highness. In fact, I want to be helpful enough that you won’t even want to think of getting rid of me.”

“You sound confident that I might kill you one day.”

You might not be planning on it now, but someday… I think you will.

I wipe the snow off of my buttocks and clear my frozen throat. He needs to accept me as his person, but I’m running out of ideas on what to say.

“You said you could kill me if you wanted to.” 1

“That…”

Rupert didn’t answer, and I know his threats are empty and pointless right now. He can’t do anything to a Bellua as Princess Lapertte. But the Emperor can.

“Again… House Bellua played no part in my decision to serve Your Highness. I came to you because I want to serve you. Is that answer not enough? Do you need more reason? Does everything need to have a logical explanation? There are always moments sometimes where there aren’t any answers.”

I gave an awkward smile and a vague answer.

Should I go somewhere to learn how to lie properly? I can easily fool Tori with very little skill, but I can’t do the same to Rupert without sounding like a big fat liar.

“Is that your reason?”

“Yes.”

Even though I hate you and am afraid of you, I have to make you think I’m on your side.

Rupert narrowed his eyes as if he was trying to read my mind, but he couldn’t see what was going on in there because I had hidden it well, in the deepest part of my mind.

On the way back to the palace, he didn’t say a word. I didn’t have anything to say to Rupert, so I didn’t either.

Neither Tori, the chief of staff, nor the servants who worked in his palace broke the awkward silence.

I was surprised to see a man blocking the path from the garden to the palace. It had been a long time since I’d seen him. In fact, it had been a little more than three years. By today’s standards, it’s been four months since I entered the Imperial Palace, which is almost half a year.

Prince Arnulf was just as handsome as I remembered him to be. I almost complimented him, but I politely bowed my head and greeted him using court etiquette. He looked at me with a relaxed gaze,

“It’s been a long time, Lariette.”

I almost frown at his friendly greeting. He and I aren’t close enough to share such personal greetings. Of course, I can’t be upset because of the difference in our statuses, but Arnulf isn’t in such a dire situation that he needs to pretend to be close to me or even Lehan.

So right now, he’s not doing this to please me.

I could tell what he wanted because of the way his soft eyes looked at Rupert with a smirk of disdain.

No one said their greetings to each other.

Rupert hadn’t even looked at him, so I answered right away.

“Yes, Your Highness the Prince, how are you?”

“I didn’t know Lariette wanted to become a maid in the palace. If I knew, then Nigelle and I could do something for you.”

It wasn’t funny. Arnulf gently grabbed my shoulder as if to show off our friendship to Rupert and say, ‘The maid beside you only came for me in the end.’

What a joke.

Arnulf is the oldest son of the Emperor. He’s ten years older than me, so he is now twenty-three. Come to think of it, he’s too old to mock his half-sister, who is only fourteen.

This made me angry. I just shook my head because I knew I couldn’t do anything even if I wanted to.

“No… it’s fine.”

“Nigelle would be so sad if she found out because she likes House Bellua a lot.”

Arnulf smiled seductively as he ruffled his shoulder-length red-blonde hair. I was horrified to find that a man his age could do that, flirting with a girl half his age. It was very different from the Arnulf I knew. This part of him confused me tremendously. Prince Arnulf was arrogant, but he’s not this sly.

I need to strengthen my ties with Rupert. I was reluctant to, but I needed to speak up, so I opened my mouth a little imprudently.

“I’m sorry. Please tell Her Highness Princess Nigelle that I will still continue to serve Her Highness Lapertte even if I was offered a position.”

Rupert, who was only looking at the air when I spoke, quickly turned his head. I looked at his large green eyes, which seemed to not believe me. Even if I told him many times until my mouth was worn out, it seemed like he wouldn’t believe me.

“What?”

Arnulf was the one who asked the question, and I continued while looking at his wry face.

“Going forward, I will continue to work for her Highness Lapertte.”

“… Is that what House Bellua wants? Is the Count that dumb?”

“Prince, I’m only thirteen years old… how could this be House Bellua’s will?”

Since he’s been raised in a position of power, I’m sure he would interpret everything with political intent. I bowed my head to avoid his scrutiny.

To him, it may look like I – or House Bellua, is trying to cross the line between the Queen, who has been good to us. However, no one will take me seriously because I’m not a man like my father, or Lehan, who will one day inherit a title.

I was determined, but I was also a little scared. My future isn’t set in stone, but the promise of a good future seemed so far away because I’m also holding Bellua’s future in my hands. It’s scary to take responsibility for the fate of the family, as my father is the one who inherited it.

I tried to hide my trembling hands, but Rupert grabbed my wrist as I shook. I shook my head in disbelief as Rupert stepped forward and stood before me, blocking my view of Arnulf.

In front of me, I’m now witnessing that four months’ worth of effort wasn’t in vain.

The boy, who was half a head shorter than me, has grown at a frightening rate and is now about my height. His voice is also getting lower, so he won’t be able to hide that he’s a boy easily as well. That’s probably one of the reasons Rupert hides in his palace.

“What?”

Arnulf’s formal smile disappeared when Rupert asked him a question. Both brothers’ faces were blank, but not in the same way. Arnulf’s expression changed first.

“I had to walk here personally because you’re not answering my messages.”

“I’ve read all of them… ‘Don’t talk to the Emperor alone.’ I know.”

“If you remember, then why aren’t you doing it?”

“His Majesty’s order comes first.”

Rupert’s words were cut short for a moment. He scratched his neck as if he was annoyed by Arnulf and tightened his grip on my wrist.

Arnulf laughed at Rupert’s response, raised his large hand, and slammed it down before Rupert could react.

Rupert’s little face swelled up within moments. It seemed natural for that twenty-three-year-old man to slap a child on the cheek. Even though he hit a face smaller than his hand, it’s as if he didn’t care and didn’t show any hesitation.

Rupert, the victim who got hit, also didn’t show any emotion.

It wasn’t the first time. 2

“You’ve become much more carefree. I thought you were a bit more reserved these days.”

“I don’t want to see you anyways.”

“You bitch… how did you seduce the Emperor with that half-blood face of yours?”

Seduce?

How could he utter such a despicable accusation of criticism towards a father-and-daughter relationship? I opened my mouth in shock at Arnulf’s vague words. I knew Rupert was being neglected, but I didn’t think he was being treated so badly and openly. When Rupert was quiet, Arnulf smiled with satisfaction.

“You should be thankful that the Imperial Family accepted you even though it isn’t certain if you’re His Majesty’s child. Ah, Vellnelni’s greatest mistake: making a prostitute as the Empress, the mother of the nation.”

I was bothered by Arnulf’s rudeness, even going so far as to insult the Empress.

The Empress doesn’t have much power. The location of the detached palace, which was tucked in the corner of the Imperial Palace as if it had been forgotten and left to rot, started to make sense.

Arnulf wasn’t arrogant because he had Duke Arnbach’s backing; instead, he just had a deep hatred of Rupert. There was no explanation for why hatred was so intense that he treated his half-sister coldly, the same one who couldn’t even properly fight for the throne.

“Did you know… the Empress of Vellneli came from a Brothel in Ardel… She’s not the Count’s adopted daughter. She’s just a lowly prostitute.”

Arnulf took his eyes off Rupert, who stiffened and looked like he was going to pass out, and said something crazy to me.

From Chapter 18: “Even if I’m a powerless princess, I can kill you without anyone knowing… be it a mouse… or a bird.” ↩️

Based on this moment of abuse, Lari quickly figures out that this isn’t the first time that Arnulf has hit the defenseless Rupert like this. ↩️