Your Regrets Are Late - Chapter 8
“How can such a vulgar illegitimate child be my sister?”
“What kind of ugly words is that when you are in front of your father!”
Duke Marsetta immediately raised his voice.
Charelize approached Lillian behind him. The attitude of Duke Marsetta, who hastily hid her behind him, was hilarious.
“Your Grace made a stupid choice.”
“What?”
“If you were thinking of making that child as a princess, at least you should have brought her when the ground where my mother’s body had dried up.”
“That… The situation was urgent, and there was nothing I could do.”
“I don’t know why I should understand the situation of Your Grace. It’s been a few days since my mother’s funeral, and now you are bringing the illegitimate child you saw from outside?”
It wasn’t Duke Marsetta who should be angry.
“When it comes to deception, Your Grace is the top.”
“…”
“All I wanted was… just one warm glance. A kind word. That was all.”
“…”
“I understand the situation where you had to part away with the person you love. Even if you don’t respect my mother, even if you don’t treat me, all I wanted was that. I thought if I did my best, you would look back at me someday. You will accept my existence.”
“…”
“I held on with that thought.”
It was pathetic that Charelize didn’t give up on him; tears welled up.
“Do you know how many assassins came to me in the middle of the night?”
“…”
“Have you ever tried to get to know me, even once, when I had no choice but to annul my engagement with young Master Radiasa?”
Duke Marsetta still kept his mouth shut despite the continuing questions.
Charelize was about to explode with rage. As she spoke one by one with her own mouth, she laughed out loud because the life she had lived was so absurd.
“I still have vivid memories of you denying my life… as if it wasn’t enough to say that I’m not your daughter, you pushed me away when I was in tears of longing for my father’s hug.”
She couldn’t stop her tears from flowing. Even if she didn’t want to cry, her heart ached.
“My mother was always sick. My father abandoned me. I grew up alone. I have never been protected by anyone.”
Duke Marsetta bit his lip and tried to reach for her hand.
At that moment, the afterimage of her past collided. It was intertwined with her memory that the Duke slapped off her hand, who was screaming at the unfairness. Charelize slapped his hand. Surprised by the apparent refusal, Duke Marsetta widened his eyes.
“Father.”
“…”
It was the first time Charelize called Duke Marsetta as a father after her regression.
“Today is the last time I have called Your Grace as my father. Since you never thought of me as your daughter, I will no longer consider you as my father.”
“Are you sure… you don’t want to listen to me?”
“You didn’t even believe me when I said it was unfair. What kind of face do you have to expect me to understand you…? And what do you mean by saying that child is my sister!”
When she screamed, her voice couldn’t come out properly because of the strain on her neck.
Charelize vowed to stay calm countless times, and that’s how she controlled her heart. Whether her last words were the catalyst, her shriveled emotions flooded endlessly.
“If you couldn’t be my father, you shouldn’t have given birth to me.”
She hoped that the tears she now shed would be the last for Duke Marsetta to see. She will no longer show her weakness nor seek affection. She just gave up on that foolish thought. It’s been a while since Charelize, who was smiling broadly while hiding her feelings, had died.
Charelize didn’t do anything, but Duke Marsetta was afraid she would hurt Lillian. He hid Lillian behind him with anxiety, as his father’s affection toward Lillian made Charelize feel tearful.
‘If only mother wasn’t forced to be with you… If only I was a child born because you wanted to. Would you love me? Would you be a loving father to me just like you did to Lillian?’
No one answered that question.
Charelize felt relieved because she didn’t want to feel the fear of the injustice that would return.
“If you take my exclusive maid for that child one more time, I will rip her mouth so she will never call Your Grace again.”
“…”
“You know what I’m saying wasn’t a joke, right? Your Grace was the one who told me to keep the words you spit out no matter what.”
“…”
“…Do you know? Lari was also my mother’s person.”
With those words, Charelize grabbed Lari’s wrist and left the annex. On the way to her room, she didn’t say anything.
When her mother died, Lari cried until she nearly fainted. It was natural for Lari to feel upset that she had to work for the illegitimate child whom Duke Marsetta had brought. But fearing that Charelize would be harmed if she rebelled, Lari endured it.
“If this happens again, call me right away.”
Charelize said that as she pulled the wound healing ointment out of her drawer and applied it to Lari’s hand.
“That, Your Highness, what if I worked for someone else?”
“As I said before, you’re my person. I will protect you no matter what.”
Tears welled up in Lari’s eyes immediately. She spoke in a weeping voice as if her tears were about to burst.
“I was an orphan. I was born without parents and ran away after being abused in an orphanage. Madam was the one who saved me.”
“Really?”
“I don’t know how warm the hand that Madam gave me. It’s still sad that my Master passed away, but I’m glad that Your Highness will always be by my side.”
“…”
“Your Highness must be tired, so get some rest today.”
Lari, hugging Charelize tightly, covered her with a blanket, looked over the bed, and left her room.
It was a night with so many thoughts that Charelize couldn’t sleep.
* * *
“Older Sister!”
“I’m leaving now, Your Highness.”
“Okay.”
It was when she was talking about business. Charelize was displeased by the voice that seemed to call her.
There was only one person who referred Charelize as older sister, Lillian. Lillian smiled broadly, waving her hand as if she had really met someone she was familiar with. The maid, who had followed Lillian belatedly, bowed her head with a terrified expression on her face.
“Why am I your sister?”
“You’re my sister, aren’t you? We’re the princesses of Duke Marsetta with the same father. You’re the only sister who shared the same blood with me, and I hate calling someone with hard titles.”
Lillian stuck her tongue out slightly and smiled bashfully. The more Lillian continued her words, the more Charelize became restless. The maid, whose complexion had rapidly turned pale, looked into Charelize’s eyes.
“Really… I don’t know where to start pointing out your stupidity.”
Charelize took a deep breath and answered in an annoyed voice.
“Pardon?”
“First, I’m a little Duchess, not a princess. I’m the successor to this family.”
“…”
“Second, how can you, who doesn’t even get the last name of Marsetta, become a princess and become my sister? You will never become my younger sister, even if you’re officially registered.”
Charelize was taken aback by Lillian’s words. She thought Lillian was the person whom she couldn’t communicate with.
‘Is she pretending to be stupid, or she’s really that innocent?’
“…Why? Is that because I’m an illegitimate child?”
“Lady Lillian!”
As the maid, who had been in an uneasy look, stopped Lillian hastily, Charelize gestured her hand to stop her.
“The little Duchess position that Sister loved so much was mine. Even the hostess of this mansion, they said that it belonged to my mother—”
Belatedly realizing that she had made a mistake, Lillian hurriedly raised her hand and covered her mouth.
“Lillian de Buzz.”
People around, including Charelize, had already heard of it. Charelize didn’t get angry, nor did she raise her voice. She just called Lillian’s name. Lillian’s surname wasn’t Marsetta, but Buzz, as she was adopted by Baron Buzz.
Lillian, who had no answer for her, felt defeated.
“How could a father and his daughter be this same? You think the same, to the point that you can be recognized without having to do a blood test.”
Lillian flinched at Charelize’s cynical answer.
“You… Why do you think I’m looking at you now?”
“Wh-What is that?”
“Because you looked down on me so much that it’s not enough to call me as sister, are you insulting my mother, who is already deceased?”
“…”
“Because I’m feeling sorry for you? Or because I wanted to look good in front of the Duke?”
“…”
“They’re all wrong. The reason I look over your rudeness is simply because it’s not worth it. I didn’t feel the need to devote my time to feel the emotions.”
“If dad hears what you just said, he surely will be disappointed.”
“I don’t know why you’re playing with your mouth like this.”
Charelize grabbed Lillian’s hair. When she saw the silver hair that looked exactly like Duke Marsetta, she got even angrier and pulled it forward with more strength. Then she whispered in a voice that could only be heard in Lillian’s ear.
“When the Duke dies, I will be the owner of the Duchy. No matter how much you’re registered as a princess, it will be enough if I send you to become a concubine of an old nobleman or to another country.”
“…”
“Did you try to convince the Duke to take his successor position from me?”
“L-Let me go…”
“If you tremble like this, you won’t be able to even start. I’m already losing interest. What do I do with this?”
Lillian trembled her whole body. Charelize, who said that, looked scary.
“It doesn’t matter to me now if the Duke is disappointed.”
“…”
“Because I threw him away first.”
“…”
“I-It hurts!”
“If you’re a guest who is going to stay here for a while, you must do so.”
Charelize, who let Lillian’s hair down, smiled. Lillian, who had slumped down, groaned.
“Martin.”
“Yes, Your Highness.”
“Prepare water to wash right away. I touched something disgusting and dirty.”
Charelize passed Lillian and called Martin.
“I will kill you…”
“Lady Lillian?”
“I’m the princess of Duke Marsetta! A princess!”
Lillian screamed and cried belatedly with all her might.
* * *
“Your Highness, you’re so cool! Did you see that woman’s face? She was even more scared than me.”
“Really?”
After hearing Martin’s words, Charelize replied sensibly.
“What happened, Your Highness?”
Lari, who was next to her, asked curiously.
“I threw food to the prey.”
“Um… Are you talking about Lillian?”
“Yes. By now, she must be eating well.”
“Pardon?”
“Doesn’t she, the type who originally starved her stomachs, attack without knowing it was poisoned?”
“By the way, Your Grace gave Lillian Rosnia’s room. Even if she staying in the annex is also a situation where he should have to be very careful!”
Lari said with a resentful look.
“Rosnia… isn’t it the place only allowed for the eldest daughter or the royal princess?”
“As soon as I heard it, I was blown away. He even gave Dina to serve her.”
Rosnia was the room Charelize used when she was a princess. After she became the little Duchess and moved her room, she locked that room so no one could enter except for the cleaning maids. One of the two keys was still in her possession.